all of us. we appreciate your time right now on jimmy kimmel. rob mcelhaney and chris stapleton, have a great >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- rob mcelhenney, and chris stapleton. with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everyone.

i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us here in hollywood. we had a -- what a day this was. i have to tell you, i don't know if you know about this. but i had a tumultuous morning. i had a headache. i woke up about 5:00 a.m. i took advil. i took aspirin. i took everything we had. and then i went back to sleep. and usually i wake up at 7:00 and make everyone breakfast, but on this rare occasion my wife was kind enough to let me remain in bed writhing in pain and when i got out of bed at 9:00 a.m. i had 100 text messages. usually i'll have maybe four. i had 100 because it appears that i once again ruffled the feathers of our kentucky fried former president. [ laughter ] who is apparently, with all that's going on, still smarting from my joke about him at the oscars. [ whoops ] you know, donald trump is in the first week of a criminal trial. the first president to be on trial for a criminal offense, for paying hush money to a

pornographic film star. [ laughter ] he was in court all day monday, all day yesterday. today, he had a day off, and how did he spend it? brunch with melania? no. maybe catch with barron in the yard? no, no. ranta claus got up bright and early to post 165 venomous words about yours truly. [ cheers and applause ] i'll read it to you. it begins, "stupid jimmy kimmel." [ laughter ] we're off to a good start! [ laughter ] "who still hasn't recovered from his horrendous performance and big ratings drop as host of the academy awards, especially when he showed he suffered from tds, commonly known as trump derangement syndrome --" [ laughter ] "to the entire world by reading on air my truth about how bad a job he was doing that night, right before he stumbled through announcing the biggest award of all, "picture of the year." it was a classic choke, one of the biggest ever in show business, and to top it off, he forgot to say the famous and mandatory line, "and the winner

is." instead, he stammered around as he opened the envelope. supposedly his wife, and even management, begged him not to do it, "don't read his truth, jimmy, please don't do this," they said. [ laughter ] he was made to look like a fool, which he is, and at the same time go down in television history as the worst host ever of the once vaunted academy awards!" [ cheers and applause ] so my first thought is i'm impressed by his use of the word "vaunted." [ laughter ] he was even able to spell it correctly, which is really good, very well done. but literally everything else is not just wrong, but maybe we should be worried about him wrong. maybe we should take the keys away from grandpa wrong. [ laughter ] let's go through it again and just do a fact check line by line. starting with "stupid jimmy kimmel." all right, that part might be true. that's debatable. [ laughter ] that's a matter of opinion. "who still hasn't recovered from his horrendous performance and big ratings drop as host of the academy awards."

that's weird because i thought i read in the news that the ratings went up this year. [ cheers and applause ] "especially when he showed he suffered from tds, commonly known as trump derangement syndrome." now, that is false. there's only one person who suffers from trump derangement syndrome. his name is donald trump. okay? [ cheers and applause ] "to the entire world by reading on air my truth about how bad a job he was doing that night, right before he stumbled through announcing the biggest award of all, "picture of the year." all right, two things here. maybe three even. number one, i did not present the award for best picture. [ laughter ] i was the host. the host doesn't present awards, the presenters present the awards. and the person who presented the award was al pacino, not me. we are different people. [ laughter ] now don't get me wrong, i wish i was al pacino. i'm just not. he's al pacino, i'm me. you'd think he'd know that because i'm pretty sure "say hello to my little friend" is

what he said to stormy daniels that got him in all this trouble. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] but maybe all italians look alike. i don't know. "it was a classic choke, one of the biggest ever in show business, " again, not me. "and to top it off, he forgot to say the famous and mandatory line, "and the winner is." not correct. that's not the mandatory line. also still not me. [ laughter ] "instead, he stammered around as he opened the envelope." again, i didn't open the envelope. [ laughter ] i didn't even touch the envelope. i did not present the award for best picture. i am not al pacino. [ laughter ] maybe you dreamed this during one of your courtroom siestas? i don't know. [ laughter ] and then he makes a leap to a completely different moment in the show when i read his dumb post and everybody laughed at him. he wrote, "supposedly his wife and even management begged him not to do it, don't read his truth, jimmy, please don't do this, they said." in his stories everyone's always begging.

"they came to me with tears in their eyes, they said sir, please sir, don't read trump's post, sir." which is not at all what happened. what happened is i saw -- they showed me what he posted, i looked and i said oh, i'm going to read this. my wife went oh, no. i said oh, yes. [ laughter ] and that was that. that was the whole story. [ cheers and applause ] and by the way, keep my wife's name out of your f-ing mouth. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] and then he closed it with "he was made to look like a fool, which he is, and at the same time go down in television history as the worst host ever of the once vaunted academy awards!" that must be why they asked me to host the show again next year. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] which i wasn't -- i wasn't planning to do but now i might. [ cheers and applause ] maybe you can watch on the tv in the rec room at riker's. with all the guys. [ cheers and applause ]

this man who was our president is on trial. he has 34 criminal charges against him. he's still mad about the oscars? that was five weeks ago! my parents don't even care anymore. [ laughter ] the only person still talking about this joke is him. it really must have got to him. by the way, in case you missed it let's show that one more time. >> get rid of kimmel and perhaps replace him with another washed up but cheap abc talent, george slopanopoulos. he would make everybody on stage look bigger, stronger and more glamorous, blah, blah, blah. make america great again. [ laughter ] okay, now, see if you can guess which former president just posted that on truth social. [ laughter ] anyone? no? well, thank you, president trump. thank you for watching. i'm surprised you're still -- isn't it past your jail time? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: i guess i should be honored that the former president of the united states took time out of his busy schedule googling "ivanka in bikini" to rant about me. [ laughter ] he must not get how much i love this. it doesn't even add up. either feeble knievel doesn't know that al pacino and i are different guys, or he didn't actually watch the oscars he claims to have hated so much. he got everything wrong. and we know he didn't forget because according to his top aides, he has an encyclopedic memory. >> donald trump has an encyclopedic memory. >> jimmy: that's right. that guy, stephen miller, you know, he starred in -- it's an interesting story. he started as a russian sex bot. the russians built him to have sex with. but he was too ugly. [ laughter ] so now he's in charge of kissing trump's beautiful ass in the most outlandish ways possible. >> the most stylish president and first lady in our lifetimes

are donald trump and melania trump. donald trump's a style icon. he changed american fashion. in “the apprentice” people spent the next ten years trying to dress like donald trump. >> jimmy: he's the male jackie o. [ laughter ] he remembers everything. people are trying to dress like him. they tried, they failed, they couldn't get the ties long enough. [ laughter ] there's so much brazen lying that goes on. these, by the way, are the ratings for the oscars over the past three years. i hosted in 2023 and '24. [ cheers and applause ] i'm not looking to boast. i just want to say that that is not down. you want to know what down looks like? this is the value of truth social's stock. that's down. [ applause ] and by the way, if you've just got to make stuff up why go with something as dumb as that? like if i was going to make stuff up about him i'd start telling people he wears diapers. [ laughter ] i would explain that it's a long trial, he drinks a lot of diet cokes to stay awake, he's getting up there in years and it's perfectly normal for a man of trump's age and carriage to

wear absorbent undergarments. to stop the leaks. [ laughter ] if i was making stuff up, i would point out that the reason he stands like this and golfs like this and plays tennis like this is because he has a full diaper strapped around his little mushroom garden. okay? [ cheers and applause ] that's what i would do. if he wins, i'm going to have to move. i don't know. [ laughter ] good-bye, everybody. i'm out of here. anyway. all right. i think we've had enough of donald trump. hey, we've got something -- we've been -- i say we but i have not been working on this at all. our crew has been working very hard rebuilding our outdoor stage. we had to shut this down during covid. so this outdoor stage which we used to love and we'd have these great performances outside has not been available to us for more than four years, but we worked extra hard, and again, i had nothing to do with working but they worked extra hard building it for chris stapleton, who is here tonight.

[ cheers and applause ] chris stapleton, great artist, great guy, is going to be playing songs from his new album "higher" tonight. but before that we have a challenge for chris. he's a ten-time grammy winner. he's one of the most accomplished singers, songwriters in the world. but can he sing a song he has never sung or even seen before? it's time to find out. it's time to "wing it and sing it." [ cheers and applause ] >> good to see you. >> jimmy: chris stapleton, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] chris, thank you for being here. very excited that you're here. and i was very tickled to learn that you are a fan of the show "full house." or at least you were when you were a kid? >> sure. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay. that is the theme for our song tonight. we've written lyrics. these are lyrics that chris has not seen. correct? you've never seen these? >> obviously. >> jimmy: okay. now, the music is going to be up to you. you've got to play something on the guitar. but what chris will do is start

playing a melody and i will reveal the cards each one at a time and you will sing the words on those cards. >> are we ready? >> jimmy: yeah. you start playing and then i'll show the first card. [ laughter ] >> this is really silly. >> jimmy: yeah, you shouldn't have done this. ♪ ♪ i've sung many songs about the folks of mine ♪ ♪ the family in my band my friends and my wife ♪ ♪ but the one human being whom i love most ♪ ♪ is an american treasure named john ♪ ♪ john stamos ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ he's the reason i'm singing this ballad ♪ ♪ he's the feta cheese, oh, in my greek salad ♪ ♪ when the kids are all gone, and so is my spouse ♪ >> come on, jimmy. ♪ i crack a hard seltzer and i watch full house ♪ ♪ with a sweet impish grin those dimples and that chin ♪ ♪ those pretty green eyes ♪ ♪ those shoulders, those thighs ♪ ♪ an incredible bod oh my greek golden god ♪ ♪ i'd give my ♪ ♪ i'd give -- ♪ ♪ i'd give my left nut to be part of his squad ♪

♪ and if any man ever lays a hand on my guy ♪ ♪ i'll shoot him ♪ ♪ i'll kill him ♪ ♪ i'll poke out his eye ♪ ♪ dear god tell me honestly ♪ ♪ is it a sin ♪ ♪ for wishing i'd been born a third olsen twin ♪ ♪ i'd trade all the whiskey in ol' tennessee ♪ ♪ for a minute of hanging with uncle jesse ♪ ♪ and if i shout out his name three times in a row ♪ ♪ maybe he'll appear here in this studio ♪ ♪ everybody ♪ ♪ john stamos ♪ ♪ oh, john stamos ♪ ♪ john stamos ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

>> stapleton! hey, buddy. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> that's incredible. >> john stamos, everybody. >> oh, there's more. >> yeah. well, holy [ bleep ]. ♪ wow, my dream has come true ♪ >> this is your dream? ♪ john stamos, you're awesome ♪ ♪ and i do love you ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: chris stapleton and john stamos. we have a great show. chris stapleton is here. we'll be right back with rob mcelhenney.

i'm your overly competitive brother. and i'm ready for a rematch. game on. i've been practicing. what the cello? you want me to lower the hoop? foul! what? you going to tell on me again? foul yah? foul bro! here take a free shot go ahead knock yourself out. your about to get served. seriously? get allstate, save money, and be better protected from mayhem, like me. love you mom! wait till your father gets home.

ladies and gentlemen, please take your... [crunching] mmmm. place... mmmm. on the conveyor belt. let's move it— oh... [crunching] [alarm beeping] [crunch] [crunch, crunch, crunch] turn up the fun with crunch! shhhhhhh. don't say you can take the heat until you've tried the spicy mccrispy. no one wants to hear it, unless you've had spicy pepper sauce on the top and bottom buns. (♪) thoughts, martin?

ughh!!! shoulda bought dixie®!!! these weak store brand plates are risky business. next time, get dixie ultra® plates. three times stronger than the leading store brand. dixie. make it right®. oh man... do you stick with plump, juicy raisins? or try something deliciously frosted? best to reallyyyy chew on this one. [chewing] but maybe not so loudly. more delicious ways to bran. shopify helps you sell at every stage of your business. so you can sell it online, take it in person and go big. like a million orders big. whatever the stage, businesses that grow grow with shopify. so rich. so indulgent. it's new olay body wash. silky indulgent moisture. bye bye, dry skin. hello glow in just 14 days. indulge. with olay body wash.

♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. tonight the very highly talented, ten-time grammy award-winning singer-songwriter. he is here to chat and, well, play music from the don julio outdoor stage. the one and only chris stapleton is with us. [ cheers and applause ] and i also want to thank our friend john stamos. you can see john with the beach boys at new orleans jazzfest on april 25th and stagecoach on the 28th. tomorrow night, zendaya will be here tomorrow night. and from a new show i'm producing for hulu called "high hopes." this is set in a cannabis shop

just down the block from us here in hollywood. two friendly stoners named freddie and yuri will be with us. and we'll have music from olivia dean too. so please join us for that. you know our first guest from 16 seasons of "it's always sunny in philadelphia." on the weekends, he and his partner ryan reynolds own a football club in wales. >> here we are again, beginning another season. you and me. hopefully 100 more times. what a special thing. let's not let that pass without marking the moment of like holy [ bleep ], we're standing in the english football league now. we're in the english [ bleep ] football league now. >> we're back. we're back. >> jimmy: season 3 of "welcome to wrexham" premieres may 2nd on fx and streams the next day on hulu. please welcome rob mcelhenney! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

>> jimmy: i know you had a big weekend. you had a birthday this weekend. you had a big win for your team, which is just like -- it's an -- explain, because most people in america don't understand the intricacies of soccer, me included. but -- or football. >> football. >> jimmy: as you now have to call it or you'll be thrown out of the town. but explain what happened here. what happened to your team over the past two seasons? >> well, i have a whole documentary series about it, jimmy, which you're welcome to watch. >> jimmy: i understand -- i understand it. but just to put it in simple terms. >> yes. so it's just something that would be anathema to american sports. but picture whoever comes in last place in the nfl this year -- who had the worst record? >> jimmy: i ought forget. i don't remember. >> who was it? >> carolina.

>> carolina. let's just say carolina had the worst record. they would get kicked out of the league and kicked down a league below, and they would have to fight their way back. and let's just say they came in last place in that second league. they would get kicked out again to a lower league. and they would continue a precipitous fall. >> jimmy: till eventually they were playing high school football. >> that is correct. [ laughter ] and there are truly -- i think there's something like 16 or 17 leagues in english football and you get to a certain point where it's semi-professional and you're playing against cops and firemen. >> jimmy: and conversely, if you win you get to move up? >> correct. >> jimmy: and you guys have moved up two seasons in a row. which hasn't happened for how long? [ cheers and applause ] >> it hasn't happened for our club in -- double promotion like that in a row, 169 years. >> jimmy: 169 years. that's even a long time for a team to be around. >> yes. >> jimmy: and do you credit yourselves for this? i mean, you must, right? [ laughter ] listen, the players were there before you and things weren't going so well until you guys showed up. >> no.

ryan and i have no delusion. we joke about this all the time because we're either there at the stadium or we're at home and we're screaming at the television, of course, as any good sports fan knows that they do. but we have no bearing on what happens on the pitch. you're putting all of your hopes and dreams into young men and women between the ages of 19 and 25. >> jimmy: yeah. but yet somehow the magic has happened there. >> yes. >> jimmy: which is incredible. and also your birthday. so you and ryan have a fun thing that you do. i don't know if it's fun for you. i don't know if it's fun for him. but every year on your birthdays, this has become -- i'd imagine there's a lot of pressure now involved because it's become a one-man -- a one-upmanship situation. >> he started it. i just -- a few years ago on april 14th, which is my birthday, i just went onto instagram. kaitlin screamed, my wife kaitlin, from upstairs, check your instagram. and i see that ryan had done

this video of this dedication he'd made at the stadium in wales. the robert lucinda mcelhenney, which is not my middle name. [ laughter ] memorial urinal. and he put a plaque next to the urinal. and now anybody can go there and do their business on my plaque. my face. [ laughter ] and he said happy birthday at the end of it. so then it became -- i had to try and top that. so the following year i got him a blimp with a terrible picture of -- i don't know if you've seen the movie "deadpool." ryan's very handsome in the movie. until he gets burned very badly. so i took that image of him being burned very badly and put it on a giant blimp. and i sailed it across the town of wrexham. we broke a bunch of welsh aviation laws. >> jimmy: i think that's how the hindenburg happened.

there was a burned face emblazoned on it. >> the humanity was spared. >> jimmy: this year -- i think we have a photograph of what ryan did to you this year. this is the -- [ laughter ] a sketch he had made. and he set up a website and sold merchandise with this image on it. >> yes. well, he went so far as to -- once again i heard my wife scream rob, check out your instagram. so i was like i know it's ryan. king of instagram. so i go to it and there's a whole video about how april 14th, which is my birthday, is also the day that the "titanic" sank. >> jimmy: oh, wow. the hindenburg and the "titanic." >> yeah. and also the day president abraham lincoln was shot. so it's a real great day in history. anyway, ryan made this video about how they made an expedition down to the "titanic" and they were looking for wrexham lager because wrexham lager, which is a beer that is

actually distilled in wrexham, was on the “titanic.” so it's become part of the lore. so he went down to look for wrexham lager and what he found was a sketch pad and the sketch pad was not rose from the movie "titanic" but this hairy gentleman right here. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. >> that's not -- >> jimmy: do you feel like you're starting to fit in over there in wrexham? because i know culturally it's obviously very different. but you have to do things right. >> yes. i'm very careful about using the term "football." we always want to be respectful of the fact that we are outsiders, an american and a canadian that are coming in. and we want to adopt a lot of the culture and not try to change anything. but there are certain things we can't. >> jimmy: like what? >> that just don't translate. well, there's use of a word over there that begins with a "c"

that means something very different to us here. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, yeah. >> it does not translate. >> jimmy: doesn't it mean the same thing? >> not really. >> jimmy: they use it a lot there. >> they use it a lot and it's used freely. >> jimmy: but here it's so rarely. >> it's not gender specific. it's just -- you hear it in casual conversation. i was at a restaurant. i heard a 12-year-old call another 12-year-old this. [ laughter ] in a joking fashion. they were having -- >> jimmy: guillermo, do you know what word he's talking about? >> guillermo: conk? [ laughter ] i don't know. >> jimmy: that was so wrong i don't even think we need to bleep it. [ laughter ] >> guillermo: i don't know. >> jimmy: yes. the conch shell. you blow into it and -- >> guillermo: i don't know. >> close enough. >> jimmy: so you're trying not to bring that word over here. >> i just keep it out of the vernacular. because i don't want to code switch and worry about coming back -- >> jimmy: you don't want your sons calling each other that word. >> exactly.

i don't want kaitlin to scream down hey, [ bleep ] check your instagram. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: now he knows. >> i just broke my own rule on a disney-owned platform. >> jimmy: you know what? we're doing some challenges tonight. we did one with chris earlier and i have a challenge for you when we come back, rob mcelhenney. rob mcelhenney is here. [ cheers and applause ] >> announcer: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by intuit. visit intuit.com to left hand more. but instead remade over and over... into the things that keep our food fresher, our families safer, and our planet cleaner. to help us get there, america's plastic makers are investing billions of dollars to create innovative products and new recycling technologies for sustainable change.

because when you push for smarter solutions, big things can happen. (♪) far too few people know what a mccrispy is. but the ones who do say it's juicy. and when you taste it, you'll say that too. (♪) welcome to the new petsmart treats rewards™. ♪ready, go!♪ collect points with every purchase. and right now, buy 2 dog treats or chews and get the 3rd 50% off. ♪anything for you♪ petsmart. anything for pets. ♪ ("holiday road") ♪ ♪ holiday road ♪ wherever your summer takes you, twist the ride... with twizzlers. the twist you can't resist.

this... is the home... of real... adventure. this is the most dangerous environment on earth. these are real stories. wow! real heroes. real explorers. it's time to take it to another level. yesss! (♪) oh my god! (♪)

>> jimmy: we're back with rob mcelhenney. his show "welcome to wrexham" the new season is about to start on fx and on hulu. and i assume you're working on "it's always sunny in philadelphia" season 17? >> that is correct. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: do you know when that will premiere? >> i do not. but i have another series called "mythic quest" which is premiering on apple tv plus. >> jimmy: that's a good one. okay. you're a philly guy. we all know that. you've got a show that states it in the title. you love the eagles. you love the flyers. you love the phillies. all the teams. all the stuff. but can you identify which of the citizens walking by our theater happen to be from philadelphia or not? the key here is you're not going to be able to actually hear them speak because we feel that might give it away. >> that will definitely give it away. >> jimmy: yes. but you can ask any question you like. they can nod yes or no.

let's go out in the street now. on hollywood boulevard. our announcer lou is standing by. hi, lou. lou, what are you wearing? lou, why -- >> lou: it's a cheesesteak, jimmy. >> jimmy: aren't those stereotypes? cheesesteaks? do you guys get tired of hearing about cheesesteaks? >> we are the birthplace of the nation, and we are known for our cheesesteaks. i don't understand. [ applause ] >> jimmy: well, you can't eat a birthplace, you know? >> that's true. you can't eat a birthplace. >> jimmy: lou, let's bring in our first pedestrian. okay. oh, supreme is his name. that's a name that's hard to live up to, huh? that's right. you can't speak. but go ahead, rob. ask any question you like and we'll see if you can tell if this supreme, gentleman named supreme, is from philadelphia. >> okay. i like the neck tattoo. that's going to go a long way. >> jimmy: can we zoom in a little bit on the neck tattoo and see if it gives anything away? it's the letter "r." >> it's just the fact that he

has a neck tattoo. >> jimmy: it might be for rob. is the neck tattoo for rob as in rob mcelhenney? >> no. he also seems sober in the middle of the day. [ laughter ] so i'm going to say that's a knock against him being from philadelphia because he's probably on vacation if he's out here. and it is midday. hmm. can i ask you a yes or no question? >> jimmy: yeah, go ahead. >> okay. is john a word? he's from philly. >> jimmy: he's from philly. supreme, are you from philadelphia? >> i am from philly. [ cheers and applause ] germantown. >> jimmy: supreme, how many kids in your family? >> like seven. >> jimmy: and what are their names? >> supreme, master, shabazz, diamond and justice. >> jimmy: that is an incredible trip through the thesaurus. we have a gift for supreme to

make him feel at home. what do we have there, lou? >> lou: we've got a cookbook for patty's pub. >> jimmy: there you go. patty's pub. thank you, supreme. you want to try one more? >> let's do another. >> jimmy: you get through two we have a special prize for you too. oh, come on, right? >> okay. >> jimmy: this guy looks like -- it looks like they pried him out of the liberty bell. >> he looks like he knows his way around a tastee cake. now, sir, can i ask you a question? okay. i'd assume you've been to jail. [ laughter ] but have you ever been to jail -- been thrown in jail at a family reunion? >> jimmy: oh. >> okay. that's not -- >> jimmy: he says no, but he had to think about it. >> had to think about it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he did have to think about it. >> vance, have you ever urinated into a trash can at a sporting event?

he's from philly. he's from philly. >> jimmy: vance, are you from philadelphia? >> i am not from philadelphia. >> jimmy: hold on. >> okay. >> jimmy: vance, but you are from the east coast for sure, right? >> absolutely. jersey shore. [ laughter ] >> sorry, vance. i mean, that's the same thing. >> jimmy: it's pretty much the same thing, vance. vance, you are claimed by rob mcelhenney as a philadelphian. we have a gift for vance there, lou? >> lou: of course. season 4 of "it's always sunny in philadelphia." >> season 4. >> jimmy: that is the one to start with if you haven't watched the show. "welcome to wrexham" season 3 premieres on may 2nd, 10:00 on fx and the following day on hulu. rob mcelhenney, everybody. thanks. [ cheers and applause ] happy belated birthday, rob. we'll be back with chris stapleton. at oofos, we don't make footwear. we make shock absorbers. fatigue

fighters. mobility maximizers. this is the science of active recovery. revolutionary oofoam technology absorbs impact and reduces pressure. it's the foundation of every pair of oofos, and the key to recovering faster. this is not a shoe. this is oofos active recovery. activate your recovery with oofos. (vo) it's shrimp your way. choose three flavors for just $20*. like new street corn shrimp. and our famous garlic shrimp scampi. it's time to grab some cheddar bays and get flavorfull. hurry in to try shrimp your way, only at red lobster. it's time to feed the dogs real food, not highly processed pellets. the farmer's dog is fresh food made

with whole meat and veggies. it's not dry food. it's not wet food. it's just real food. it's an idea whose time has come. what is cirkul? cirkul is the fuel you need to take flight. cirkul is the energy that gets you to the next level. cirkul is what you hope for when life tosses lemons your way. cirkul, available at walmart and drinkcirkul.com. ladies and gentlemen, please take your... [crunching] mmmm. place... mmmm. on the conveyor belt.

let's move it— oh... [crunching] [alarm beeping] [crunch] [crunch, crunch, crunch] turn up the fun with crunch! crème on the left, i program you to think for yourself my boy. you're sure that's a good idea? what's the worst that can happen? i'm going to twist on it. hello, father. yeah, absolutely not. he's perfect!

[ cheers and applause ] say something nice. >> you're the only you. be yourself. >> say something nice about her. >> um -- >> she's super smart. >> say something nice. >> yes, um -- everyone in the world's beautiful. everybody is. no matter what you are, no matter who you are, everyone's beautiful. >> even donald trump? >> no, he's [ bleep ]. complete [ bleep ]. yeah. [ cheers and applause ] with apretude, a prescription medicine used to reduce the risk of hiv without daily prep pills. with one shot every other month, just 6 times a year. in studies, apretude was proven superior to a daily prep pill in reducing the risk of hiv. in reducing the risk of hiv. before each injection.of hiv. if you think you were exposed to hiv or have flu-like symptoms, tell your doctor right away. apretude does not prevent other sexually transmitted infections. practice safer sex to reduce your risk. don't take apretude if you're allergic to it or taking certain medicines, as they may interact.

tell your doctor if you've had liver or kidney problems or mental health concerns. if you have a rash or other allergic reactions, stop apretude and get medical help right away. serious side effects include allergic reactions, liver problems, and depression. some of the most common side effects include injection-site reactions and headache. you must receive apretude as scheduled. ask your doctor about long-acting apretude. and prep without pills. save at apretude.com. ♪ bacon. bacon. bacon. introducing applebee's new whole lotta bacon burger. just $9.99 for a limited time. applebee's. now that's eatin' good in the neighborhood. (♪) [shaking] itchy pet? (♪) with chewy, save 20% on your first pharmacy order

so you can put an end to the itch. get flea and tick medication delivered right to your door. [panting] ♪ making your way in the world today ♪ ♪ takes everything you've got. ♪ ♪ you wanna be where you can see... ♪ ♪ troubles are all the same. ♪ ♪ you wanna go where everybody knows your name. ♪ they're grrreat! ♪ i'll stop the world and melt with you ♪ ♪ ♪ mmmm ♪ ♪ i'll stop the world and melt with you ♪ have you had your hershey's?

♪ on your period, sudden gushes happen. say goodbye gush fears! thanks to always ultra thins... with rapiddry technology... that absorbs two times faster. hellooo clean and comfortable. always. fear no gush. >> university of maryland global campus is a school for real life, one that values the successes you've already achieved. earn up to 90 undergraduate credits for relevant experience and get the support you need from your first day to graduation day and beyond. what will your next success be? shhhhhhh. don't say you can take the heat until you've tried the spicy mccrispy. no one wants to hear it, unless you've had spicy pepper sauce on the top and bottom buns. (♪)

you made a cow! actually it's a piggy bank. my inspiration to start saving. how about a more solid way to save? i'm listening. well, bmo helps get your savings habit into shape with a cash reward, every month you save. both: cash reward? and there's a cash bonus when you open a new checking account to get you started. wow. anything you can't do? ( ♪ ) mugs. ♪ bmo ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: our next guest is a multi-grammy and cma-winning country music star so talented, he can sing the star spangled banner and make a grown man cry.

his latest album is called "higher," please welcome chris stapleton. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> good, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm great. and i'm still so impressed you were able to -- it's unbelievable. >> i'm still so impressed that you threw john stamos on me just as a surprise. >> jimmy: john, by the way -- >> that's going pretty far for a gag. >> jimmy: he asked me to give you a gift. you can take this home to the family. [ laughter ] >> fantastic. >> jimmy: that's rare right there. you did something that i have to say i get a lot of e-mails and almost none of them i like. i got an e-mail from you saying, hey, when i'm on the show what song would you like me to do? and i was like oh, this is exciting. i get to pick the song. would you have done any song i requested or were there -- >> hopefully would have been off the record. [ laughter ]

but i would have at least considered it, yeah. >> jimmy: like if i was like yeah, i'd love to have you do "hava nagila" that would be something -- >> i'd have to work it up. >> jimmy: i asked for the song "it takes a woman." i really enjoy most of your music if not all of your music. i particularly have enjoyed that one off the new album. >> thank you. >> jimmy: and i thought maybe it was one that you hadn't done live on tv before. >> not just on tv. we haven't played it live anywhere. so we're going to play it live for the first time here. >> jimmy: excellent. [ cheers and applause ] this is a song -- i assume it is about your wife, morgan? >> absolutely, yeah. >> jimmy: it would have to be. is she at this point -- like you dedicated i know the album to her. is she like impressed by a gesture like this or is she like, this is your fifth album, why did this take so long? [ laughter ] >> maybe both. >> jimmy: when you dedicate -- you have a song, you write these beautiful songs about your wife,

does it make it difficult for her to like get you -- i know your birthday was on tax day, right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: what did she get you for that day? >> i paid my taxes. no. she got me a book. i'm a big james bond fan. i like james bond stuff. action movie stuff. >> jimmy: okay. >> but she got me this book that there were all these destinations from bond films, like places where they -- the locations where they filmed. and her idea was hey, maybe we should go to one of these places. we haven't planned it yet but we're going to flip through the book -- >> jimmy: that's a great idea. >> go someplace exotic from a bond film. >> jimmy: you're not at a place where you travel so much you don't want to go anywhere, you'd rather stay home? >> no, i'm like that too. but my wife would like to see some things. >> jimmy: your wife would like to have some fun for a change. you also have your own whiskey now. >> i do. >> jimmy: which is traveller whiskey. >> that's correct. >> jimmy: i was wondering when that was going to happen because you covered tennessee whiskey.

and i thought at the time, there must be a bunch of whiskey companies banging on your door to do something. >> we had a lot of them. we were waiting for the right one and this was it. >> jimmy: have you thought about writing songs about other products that might be financially -- like skittles or dog food or something like that? >> we'll see how the whiskey thing turns out. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this is a photo that we obtained from i believe your high school yearbook. this is -- >> that's a good one right there. >> jimmy: what year are we talking about right there? >> that looks like '95, '96. >> jimmy: and you were what, 33, 34 years old in this picture? [ laughter ] how is it possible you're younger now than you were in high school? >> i don't know, man. >> jimmy: were you the shop teacher at your high school? >> i was. [ laughter ] absolutely, yes. >> jimmy: it says, the quote here is interesting. "it was cool to get to sing for the governor." the governor of kentucky you sang for? >> i assume so if i said that. [ laughter ] i don't really recall. >> jimmy: really? >> i'm pleading the fifth on

that one. i don't remember doing that. but i'm assuming i did. i don't know if it was the national anthem. i did that song back then. >> jimmy: and here's another one. >> that's a good one. >> jimmy: you were voted most stylish. which is pretty sweet. is that your mustang? [ applause ] >> that's my car. >> jimmy: go in farther if you can. i want to get a look at what most stylish looked like there. >> oh, yeah. it's 1996. >> jimmy: were you known as a snappy dresser? >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: oh, really? wow. did you run for student council? >> i did everything that was available to do. >> jimmy: did you? >> yeah. >> jimmy: were you a good student? >> i was the valedictorian if that was -- >> jimmy: valedictorian, that means good, yeah. [ applause ] will you ever shave your beard? is that something you -- >> that's my retirement plan. >> jimmy: because you have a nice cleft in your chin like john travolta. >> i appreciate you saying that.

>> jimmy: maybe you could just shave that part of it. >> i have to go through the dwayne allman phase and get the chops coming out. >> jimmy: it could be that hair thing where you start with mutton chops and just the beard and -- >> yeah. i mean, spin a wheel -- i don't know. >> jimmy: that is your plan, though, to shave the beard one day? >> yeah. if i ever wanted to disappear i would just have to shave and just go disappear somewhere. >> jimmy: do you think you would ever -- because it's interesting. i went and saw bruce springsteen last week and he's still great and you see these artists that are still touring. is retiring something you would ever even consider? >> i mean, i love to play music. i get -- you know, i get paid to do something i would do for free. so i don't really think that would be -- i would ever fully consider not doing that. >> jimmy: right. >> if i ever, you know, had to because i was running from the law or something like that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. that's one of the negatives about being famous is that it's harder to run from the law. [ laughter ] >> yeah. 100%.

>> jimmy: all right. so you're going to do a song, "it takes a woman." which is true, by the way. without women none of us would be here. it does take a woman. >> 100%. >> jimmy: yes. [ cheers and applause ] at least one woman. >> at least one woman. but you and i both know it takes more than that. >> jimmy: we are going to go on our outdoor stage. we haven't been on that thing for -- >> i'm pumped. >> jimmy: -- four years. >> i'm so excited we get to open that thing back up. >> jimmy: chris stapleton, everybody. this is his album. it's called "higher." we'll be right back with chris stapleton. [ cheers and applause ] >> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by tequila don julio, an icon of modern mexico.

[ cheers and applause ] >> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by tequila don julio, an icon of modern mexico. >> jimmy: thanks to rob mcelhenney and john stamos. apologies to matt damon. "nightline" is next, but first, his album is called "higher." christening the return of our outdoor stage with the song "it takes a woman," chris stapleton! [ cheers and applause ]

♪ ♪ ♪ whenever i'm broken honey you heal me ♪ ♪ when i'm in the dark you are the light ♪ ♪ when i get lost you know right where to find me ♪ ♪ when i have my doubts you make me believe ♪

♪ and it takes a woman it takes a woman ♪ ♪ a woman who sees the best part of me through all that i am ♪ ♪ it takes a woman oh it takes a woman to be all i can ♪ ♪ ♪ to feel like a man it takes a woman ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ you are my comfort whenever i'm troubled ♪ ♪ when i'm alone you are my friend ♪ ♪ you make me high and keep my feet on the ground ♪

♪ whatever i need you give it to me ♪ ♪ it takes a woman it takes a woman ♪ ♪ a woman who sees the best part of me through all that i am ♪ ♪ it takes a woman oh it takes a woman to be all i can ♪ ♪ to feel like a man it takes a woman ♪

♪ oh to be all i can to feel like a man it takes a woman ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ this is "nightline." >> juju: tonight, "sopranos" star drea demateo. >> no one followed me. >> you wouldn't know it. >> bringing in big