[phone ringing] [dongseop speaks in korean] - loves thiattention. he . [dongseop speaks in [laughing] when the phone rings, my stomach starts hurting. here we are again, dumb dumb against the world. my brain right now is actually scanning every single little thing that can go wrong beuse of thishow and it's everything i ever wanted, recognition for this decade of hard work. yes, here is korea, but give me this little 10 by 10 room. come on. they always call me the, the [speaks korean], the american misses. to really find out who i am,

i don't think i'll ever have the answer to that. now as i've gotten older, perhaps i am reaching back to something familiar. so i made a place that i always wanted to go to and i'm making food that i always wanted to eat and comfort myself and then share that. [upbeat music fades] [ambient music] - (male announcer): support for reel south is provided by: [ambient room sound] - this is how much i love you to let you film me right now. i ho you understand that. [feet shuffling]

[dongseop speaks in korean] - thiss so good. [jessica speaks in korean] [dongseop speaks in korean] od. okay, so had a bakdown, i had a meltdown in front of customers, but it could've been a lot worse. you can see, this kitchen is open, that we are busting our butts and why can't people understand this is not fast food. - blah, bl, blah, blah [laug]. - when s ordered, told he "the waitg time is going to be 40 minutes, woulyou like twait or t?" no, shstands her puts her hands behind her bac likehis, like she owns the place,

and keeps coming here and staring at me angoing, xhales] uh. huh,uh, huh, h. huuuh. h." soinally, i st it a i was le, "okay, everybody free. your food is free. everyone in thisoom, yo food isree. herehere, whatid you he?" i'm so darn sensitive. but being sensitive alsoakes me pretty da good co. if i can just learn how to channel that. like iaid last night, "ge me thi10 by 10 room. give me this 10 x 10 room, please." [dongseop speaks indistinctly] d i owe yowhat? i owe yoa fantastiburger at a very baain pric now what ai gonna do çchucks]

i owe yoa fantastiburger at a very baain pric - smoke. oh! [soft music] ♪ [soft music continues] ♪ - i met dongseop after i had been in korea five days. oft music] i got the job as an epik teacher and thene worked for the hool that i had gotten placed at. i don't know. we just got really close. and it's one of those unexplainable things. totally unexpected. i still don't get it. [dongseop speaks in korean] i still don't get what thais we ha. and it always chging as the years go by,

but there's something, i thi, th we and that's a very ourselpowerful thing.e i was a teacher in i gotkorea for 15 yearskay? and i was conforming to korean culture for so long. and then, i'd always had this craving jusand then finally i exethough you know,the burgn or seen or tasted in asia [grill sizzles] so i guess i gotta make it myself. [soft music] no as i've gten older, perk to something familiar. so i mada place th i alwaysanted to gto.

and i'm making food that i always wanted to eat and mfort myse, and en sharehat. they alws call me the [spes , e americanissus. and a lot of them have commented online. oh, i feel like i'm in i lk throughhat door. i feel like i'm in america. treat everody like iould asf we were tennessee i also csider the rean cuure while m here, but i also am like, "pick up your burger. n't eat itith a knife and fork. this ain't a michelin ar restrant, pickt up. eat it like an american." buif you don want to, there's a knife and fork on your ple, you kw? yes, here is korea, but give me this little 10 by 10 room. me on. give me this little 10 by 10 room. [customer speaks in korean] [dongseop spks in korean]

[soft music] [customer speaks in korean] [dongseop spks in korean] [wav trickli] [bird cawing] [ambient nature sounds] [birds chirping] - i'm worried. - why? - i don't know what they gonna do. [reporter speaks in korean] and why don't we have vaccines? [reporter speaks in korean] - don't get. ongseop speaks in korean] - i ow. why?

- oh my god. [host speaks in korean] [jesca laughs] - she sayshat it's your playgund. [hosspeaks in rean] [jesca laughs] [merchanspe] [jessica speaks in korean] [mchant singin korea [merchanspeaks in rean] [jessica speaks in korean] shwas really on that d when .. [playful music] i mean, it okay.

and i got you got coffee. last time, i got coffee. - oh, good. yeah. [dongseop speaksn korean] [jessica speaks in korean] [doneop speaks in korean] [jessica speaks in korean] [dongseospeaks in rean] [jessicapeaks in kean] [dgseop spea in kore] [jessica speaks in korean] welcome to tennessee. i feel great here. [jessica speaks indistinctly] it's 8:15 in the morning. it's 8:15 in the morning. honey, it's starting. - tennessee ble [spes korean]. [dongseop eaks in koan] - see, ts is so funny. on camera, he looks shy, right? onamera, he oks shy, but he lov the attention. he loves this attention. on che eats it up.s shy, right? i'just like ah, blah, blah. i hate this crap. when the phone rings my stomach starts hurting. so he lovethis attenon. - at's up? ce here

- he loves this attention and i hate it. - no, i don't- - oh, yes, you do. yes, you do. [jessica speaks in korean] [dongseop speaks in korean] [jessica speaks in korean] - because ere on thehone myometown [iistinct] - , that's bull. - yeah. - you love all the attention. - no. oh, yes, y. - you y to ... - mm-hmm, mm-hmm. - watch out. - honey! honey! - mm-hmm, mm-hmm. writdown bac. you won't get it if you don't write it down. make a memo. take a memo. [dgseop spea in kore] - [speaks korean] and bacon. - oh, yeah. - and then, he'll come back, "oh, i cannot find, ah!" i've always been very introverted. but overhe years, mean, can turnt on, boom

but that's also exhausting and then we need some downtime after that because i'm a major introvert. i need to recharge. recharging is get away everybody, everything, iexcept the puppy.. my brain right now is actually scanning every sing little thing thatan go wrgy.. because of this show. i'm thinking about there could be strge people ming in re or people could just judge me the way i'm judging myself en i'm loong be strgelike, h my godn re 's the hchback of swa, you know, because i didn't stand up saight in t show and i'attacking self. oh, i di't stand ustraight. oh, my hair looks terrible [mumbles]. women. so my ain is rig that could psibly go single g wrong because of this ow.

d it's everything i ever wanted. recognition for this decade of hard work. but recognition, it'sow what'sall right here, baby. [phone ringing] - [dongseop] yeah. - i'm gonna get the pork ready. [dongsp speaks in korean] [group speaks in korean] [dongseop speaks in korean] - you excited, baby? - this is insane. [ambient outdoor sounds] [low inaudible talng]

[squeaky door latch] [doneop speaksn korean] [prons chatting] atrons chattering] [doneop spea in korean] [pn

♪ [ueat music] runts] ♪ pbeat musicontinues] ♪ - [jsica] fo. [group laughs] [upbeat music] [upbeat music continues] ♪ [dongseop speaks indistinctl - re this way?- no, thi. - look at ... [jessica speaks in korean] [dongseop speaks in korean] [jessica laughs] [dongseop speaks indistinctly] [jessica laughs] - we never had this we need a cover window.

oh, now it's- - i know. - because you madet. - i de? i madehat? i didn't wanna do the damn tshow. told you iidn't wanndo it. - you're the one that said, "we should do it. we should do it." - [lghs] reall - i can see everything he. - but i'now dancing. you didn't see. u can't see outside? - a little. i hope not. [birds chirping] [drill whiing]

[birds ciping] [prons chatting in korn] so i got a mohk and changed myair. the shape that i like to do looks like an ice cream cone. even on t tv showthis sff, ve been caed ice cream [speaks korean]. it's become quite a character of its own. then whei go out itown, people are like, "are you jessica?" and i'm like, "yeah." th're like, saw your ice , ha, ha, ." and i'm like, "yeah." and i'like, "yh." but it's ao a shield, a defense. it makes me feel me powerful.

thiss very purpose driven makeup. hopefully, it makes a shield, a wall of protection. and being fearsome is a part, i am tryg to look fearsome. otherwise, i would've not have been able to open a restaurant in a foreign country. hello, i'm nice, but don't mess with me. ath's a cock-doodle-doopower. cock-doodle, don't ss . th is what h caused les in thezone layer

not greenhouse gases, but just other women spraying hairspray. [pron speaksn korean] [patron spks in kore] [patrons chattering in korean] [patron speaks in rean] [group laughs] [patrons chatterg in koreaean] - [jsica] me, m not mous. ok. [patron speaks in korean] we are at again. me d dongop againsthe world [patronshatterinin korean] [jessica speaks in korean] - thank you. - picture, please. - okay. atrons chaering in korean]

- picture, please. - okay. - thank you. - thank you so much. [jessi speaks inorean] - love you, ssica. i love y. you'reabulous. - i love the tennessee. - [jessica] thank you. [phone rings] that's all. ohno, nevermd, dang . oh, next page. oh crap. [patron spks in kore] [doneop speaks in korean] - thank you. please tell hei said, "hello." - can get a picture? - yeah. sure, sure. oh, at's so sweet. hi,randma. [laughs] tt's so cut - [interviewer] you gonna get some help? another peon working here? - [interviewer] you - wellthe probleis in koa,

yoknow, they'rreally t on the age thing. so i have so many der customers right now. i'm worried about hiring a younger person because older people will not listen or follow a younger person. i do need somebody who's got thick skin and can handle not only the crazy customers running around here, but also handle me, which is like the gordon ramsay without the skill in the kitchen, so ... - [interviewer] you're getting close with the hair. - i am, aren't i? i am. [patrons chattering in korean] [phone ringing] [soft music]

[pron speaksn korean] [don] [patron eaks in koan] [patn speaks ikorean] [patn speaks ikorean] atron spea in korean - everyone, same time [speaks korean] [patns chatterg in korean] - [speaks korean] one shot [speaks korean] same time. [jesca speaks korean] so it's okay. everything's fine. okay. na? cheeburger [spks korea. [patron speaks in korean] [jessica speaks in korean] [patron speaks in korean]

- t a, okay. would you like [speaks korean] or [speaks korean] coleslaw? [patrospeaks in rean] ongseop spks in kore] [jessica speaks in korean] ve the eney today. this is fantastic. [soft music] [grill sizzles] [jsica spes in korean] [pa] [phone ringing] [insects buzzing] [wind bling] [jesca speaks korean] [patron spks in kore] [jessica speaks in korean] [patron speaks in korean] [grill sizes] [prons chatting in kean]

- thank yo - thanyou. goodbye.njoy. [jesca speaks korean] [patron speaks in korean] thank you. [patron speaks in korean] [patron speaks in korean] [slaps wall] [waves crashing] [mixer whirring] [phone rings] [patrons chatting in kean] [rain pattering] [rain pattering]

[rain pattering] [wind blowin [dongsp speaksn korean] [j] [patns chatterg in korea [grillizzles] blowin [jessica saks in korn] - ank you souch. - [jessica laughs] [wind blowing]

[jessica screams] [dongseop speaks in korean] [jessica pants] [wind blowing] - i can't breathe. [ambulence engine] [crickets chirping] [thunder rumbles] i dropped a pot of boiling water on my leg. so we diriding aulance. - am.

but, you know, korean 911 ambulance is free [laughs] - oh, that's as good as a firework show. oh. and this is one of my favorite moments with you, just sitting here watching a lightning storm. can we go to the beach and look at it? - yeah. [waves crashing] ah, the typhoon is gone. look at that. aves craing] [birds squawking] - mmm!

[dongseop sings in korean] oh, it's huge. [dongseop sings in korean] [ftsteps] oh, it's huge. [dongseop sings in korean] [jessica sings in korean] come on, look at that, it's a beaut. i'm gonna look at my compost. are there worms in there? oh, there's grubs. i'm prty sure th's a rely good si 'cause they're eating stuff and pooping it and that's wonderful. what is that growing? okay. sweet corn does not belo here. it does t belongn a wiy environment.

i've been trying to grow sweet scorn for about five years.re. whdo i keep growing a sweet corn? because every year i grow that corn i start noticing that as the corn grows it detects that it's windy there so it starts growing a sturdier stalk. he, just le that corn, we have to adapt to here. no, this ithe one ace you arnot allowe. to yell at me. [patron speaks in korean] seyou wednesy. [jesca laugh bye, jessica. ♪ setimes youanna go where nobo knows your name ♪ ♪ a they're aays glad you came ♪

to really find out who i am, you know, and what my purpose is on this earth, i don't think i'll ever have the answer to that, but through this creationfe and thisusiness, gden. hello, hello, hello. e things tt original came fm here, fr here, has gotten me a lot closer, you know? and i can't give that up. i'm gonna keep doing things like that thlive action, we, nohave a fig ready. yes! thlive action, we, nishere any me?ady.

that one was hiding. come on! [upbeat bluegrass music] [lily claps] - [lily] i grew up in birmingham, alabama in a white jewish family with my adopted sister. - [mother] lily! - [lily] like me, emily was adopted from korea when she was a baby, but unlike me, she's a mom. in 2019, emily traveled to korea to meet her birth mom. she recorded her journey. ♪ until now, i have never talked to my birth mom about why i was adopted. [speaking in korean] ♪

- [lily] i always question my identity. am i jewish enough? am i korean enough? it never feels as if i am enough. [ambient music] - [mother]ello, lily. hey, sweetheart.ering] oh my go eople chattering] - [ly] in just a f years, i look into t mirror and be surised to see my k. [peoe chattering] but when you'rraised to be a nice jewh girl from the south, what else ? [people chattering

i flew fm korea with these other babies and we are going home to ne unknown families. [soft sic] i know that i'not the on adoptee conflicted about eir identity there are also the birth parents wi[sofmusic] stories. i - oh, there she is. oh, hi. - [lily] to speaking to my birth mother and a fellow korean adoptee. - emily flynn. - i'm apping too, by the way. [emily laughs]

- [lily] blooking foard, asell as backward. okay. [soft music] [soft music continues] - [lily] like me, emily was adopted from korea whenhe was aaby. but unli me, she's mom. she'maybe a glpse of wha motherod might lk like. [d barks] mostly growing up, you know, i really think i just wanted to fit in. and it was also during the '80's and so adoption during that time it was very much, you know, love is enough. it was very much like a colorblind approach.

so mparents raised us all the same, which meant white, right? they didn't know any korean. they didn't have any really interest in learning about the culture where i was born, so i grew up very much thinking that even though i looked asian and i looked korean, i felt that my personal being and my face still encompassed whiteness, if that makes any sense. - isn't th weird? - hi. - could you talk about when you had your first child, che, d what it lt like to finallyind of see someone that you were biologically related to?

- yeah, i mean, it changed my life. it really just kind of, like, you know, catapulted me out of the adoption fog and iteally justonnectede to my beginnings. and it wasn't until i became a mom until i actually wanted to delve deeper into korean culture and learn more about my adoption story. - [lily] i went to find my birth mother and father in korea when i was 19 because i wanted to meet them before they forgot the details. [soft music] until now, i have never talked to my birth mom about why i was adopted. [birth mom speaks in korean]

- so how did you decide to be a mom? [birth mom speaks in korean]

- i grew up in birmingham, alabama, in white jewh family th my adopd sister and let's t that't you eaotty nose, huh?ddy? - my parents wanted me to know about korea, but wasn't inresting me. [soft music] i ways questned my ideity. am i jewisenough? am i korean enough? it never feels as if i am enough.

i was bornn korea,ut i enjomaking mzah ball sou [soft music] ibut i always feelate wtes a bit out of place. [birth mom speaks in korean]

so you didn't even know whaty disabili was? [birth mom speaks in korean] so after i was born they decided to give me up for adoption.

it wasn't before that? [birth mom speaks in korean] - [lily] in 2019, emily traveled to korea to meet her birth mom. she recorded her journey. - mily] i'm eting my bth mother for the first time. - that is exciting forou. - much. - [speaker] whtold yoabout birtmother? [emily] i arched for her. - it took two years. yo- mm-hmm.tmother?

two years searching - very bssing for u. you're going to meet your mother cause you spend your whole l. [emily ces] [pne engine roars] cause you spend your whole l. [soft music] [soft music contins] - [lily] now emily's a mother herself. havi her own ks changed r. [soft music] emily s put up for adopti because her birth mom was a single mother.

[emily and mother cries] [emily's mother speaks in korean] her birth mom was a single mother. [emily speaks in korean] [emily's mother speaks in korean]

- 's like loing in a mror. [emily's mother speaks in korean] [person speaks in korean] to relinquish me because of her at and her aunt's boyfriend. anfrom my understandingis t, you know, i was taken away she went back to try and get me back.

[birth mom speaks in korean] - look, look. - yes? - [mher] open,pen it. wanna see at that is [soft music] wow, y know whathat is"the borrors." - what's that a tape? - mm-hmm. - this is tape! it a tape. - do you know what that is?

it's a cowgirl outfit. - i. - look at the present.- o- y. - [mother] oh, my very fav, oh my heavens. i thought was sometng else. it's my very favorite perfume. and look, you even got some silken body lotion. boy, do i need that. [lily] emi is keepin in tou with her rth mom. she sent a package of korean food for the family. - whoa, yummy. - ooh, ramen. [child] men. needed so more. oh my go this pepper is from her friend's farm, ooh. - more.ild] like the - wow. what do you guys say? - thanyou. - thank you. - [emily] in korean.

[mher speaksn korean] [chi] say it again. look in the camera. [childrespeak in korean] [emily speaks in korean] [child speaks in korean] [soft music] - [lily] i was a teenager when i first at kimchi, a rean, fermted, spy cabbage sh. [soft music] the smell takes back to mid summerays outsidseoul, my birth mom hanging laundry tory [soft music] and dinner simmering on the stove. i reize i'm trng to me kimchi ain because it does mean something to me. it is a pa of me as ch as t matzah ba soup,

peaps even me. it's oneay to claim in midentity and make it my own. [soft music] - toas of last fday.tattoo. id it'seen somethg that i' been thking about for a while. i don't know, i started kind of looking at korean folklore and stuff like that and i've seen pictures of, li, folk a of korn tigers,

u know, whh is a ally impornt anima in korean lture. and mething abt that rely resonat with . so was like,yes, that'it." so that's what i'moing. i'm getting a korean tiger on my body today for the st of myife. [tattoo gun whirs] all right, here. pull up my sleeve. - why? here, pu it, so can take shirt o. - whoathat's youtattoo? - yeah, wh do you thk? - why is it like all wrined at fit? - [emilywell, theyut plasticon d while it's healing. - that is cool. - you like it? - mm-hmm.

- yohave any oer thought or, like, questions about it? hmm. yeah, i wond why hieye is like this and the other is like this? - mm. mm-hmm. - [emily] need to study some korean folk painting. - t, yeah, i le all e stripes o. - mm, mm-hmm. [birth mother speaks in korean] - now i have ... mixed feelingsbout it. i'm very lucky to have had a really great childhood

and a sister and parents who love me and many opportunities that many people do not have basically because of my parents. but i feel like, you know, if there was a trade off because of that, because i was raised in america, without really meeting korean people or korean culture, so there's a part of me that feels like it's missing.

like, in america, some people question if i am america and then in korea they question if i am korean. so i feel like i don't really fit anywhere. [birth mother speaks in korean]

- mm-hmm. [birth mother speaks in korean] of course. i always want to come back. i miss your cooking. [birth mother speaks in korean] that's a lie [laughs]. [gentle music] [birds chirping]

♪ [indistinct talking] [man stly chuces] [cheering] [indistinct talking] ♪ entle musicontinues] ♪ ♪ entle musicontinues] ♪

♪ [upbeat bluegrass music] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ - (male announcer): support for reel south is provided by:

- people might not express it, but there's gonna be a change in somebody life. that's what i'm working for. - if we don't know our history, no one else is gonna teach it to us. - i'm formally announcing my candidacy for city council district eight. [crowd cering] how my life becomes better is politics. - there came a point where it was either you can kill yourself, or you can be gay and surrender everything you've known and accepted to be true. - to really find out who i am, i don't think i'll ever have the answer to that. [ground exploding] - times like that, people come together. and i mean all of us pitching in, and that's when we started getting real. - i grew up very much thinking that even though i looked asian and i looked korean,

i felt that still encompassed whiteness. am i jewish enough? am i korean enough? it never feels as if i am enough. - i've always been a worrier. i don't trust people like i once did. - you know, i think everybody has something in tir life that changes them. [dramatic music] ♪ - i love this place, and i hate this place. like, i am this place, you know? [ambient music] ♪ you're watching pbs. ♪ ♪ ♪