>> it is hot >> it is really hot. >> you are going from the ocean with a >> florida governor ron desantis says state lawmakers will reassert control over disney world's special self-governing district. desantis and disney have been locked in an ongoing battle after the company publicly opposed the state's so-called "don't say gay" measure last year. >> desantis threatened to build a competing theme park or even a state prison next to disney. >> desantis is threatening to build a prison next to disney. ♪ ♪

>> announcer: it's "the late show with stephen colbert." tonight... owing 787. first, stephen welcomes elizabeth olsen and jena friedman. featuring louis cato and "the late show" band. and now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, it's stephen colbert! >> sphen: ce to see yo

are we getting the trombone tonight? happy wednesday. happy wednesday. happy, happy, happy, happy. hello! hello. hello. hello, my friends. [cheers and applause] >> stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! >> stephen: thank you very much. >> stephen! stephen! stephen! >> please have a seat, everybody. thank you very much. welcome. welcome one and all to "the late show." i'm your host, stephen colbert. it's a beautiful spring day here in new york. the birds are taking to the sky, bunnies are taking to the field, fox got taken to the cleaners. [cheers and applause] 'cause yesterday, fox news

settled dominion's defamation lawsuit for $787.5 million. this is a huge hit to fox's bottom line, although it's not clear if insurance will cover some of fox's liability. of course, fox has to have liability insurance to insure their ability to lie. although, although... [applause] i don't know who would insure them. maybe frauders. "we are frauders, insuring fox was dumb, dumb, dumb!" this massive settlement was the number one story on every single cable news network except one. take a guess. in fact, when the settlement was reached, fox news couldn't even bring themselves to tell their viewers how much they forked over to dominion. the closest they came was a statement from fox news host and

taxidermied corpse of howie kurtz, howie kurtz. howard, tell them how much dominion won. >> a dominion lawyer gave reporters a dollar figure for the settlement, but i have not been able to independently confirm that. >> stephen: two hours after the settlement was announced he can't confirm how much fox news paid? if only this fox news anchor had some source at fox news! this might not even be the end of the cash party for dominion. they're also suing conservative networks oann and newsmax, conspiracy lawyer sidney powell, and my pillow ceo mike lindell, for $1.3 billion. i don't think lindell has that kind of cash on hand. he's gonna to have to change his name and flee to mexico to start "mi pillow." "hola, my name is miguel pillowy foam."

♪ ♪ dominion also has a defamation case against rudy giuliani, also for $1.3 billion. [cheers and applause] that's a lot, man. they're suing rudy for everything he's got! which at this point, is a stolen cvs shopping cart full of empty merlot bottles and a jar full of spare teeth. fox news isn't even off the hook yet, either. they're also being sued for all their election lies for $2.7 billion, by a voting machine company called smartmatic. and we already know fox is afraid of this one. for proof, look at former fox host and wax sculpture of william shatner left next to an open flame, lou dobbs. lou dobbs is named as a defendant in this one and just one day after the smartmatic suit was filed, fox business canceled lou dobbs's show.

it was a big disappointment for his audience: a cage full of parakeets in the day room. but fox is trying to make some money back, because they're also a plaintiff in an election lawsuit on behalf of fox ceo lachlan murdoch, seen here asking rupert "what happened to my new stepmommy?" lachlan is suing an australian website for implying he was a conspirator in the january 6th insurrection. the actual name of that website: crikey news! now, if they lose, it'll be good for its main competitor didgeri-news. "tonight's top story: [didgeridoo music] all that, and deadly spiders in your shower."

so... we don't broadcast there, do we? it's all in good fun. fox news is out a whole lot of money, but they're not telling their viewers any of that. and they don't have to, because this settlement does not force them to own up to the damage they did to our country or apologize on their network. so... >> [booing] >> stephen: we feel the same way. so we've decided to make them apologize on our network. [cheers and applause] jim? >> before we go tonight, we want to say -- >> we're sorry -- >> to dominion -- >> and to the american people. >> we here at fox news -- >> lied to you about -- >> the 2020 election -- >> repeatedly and consistently. >> we admit that we are guilty -- >> of amplifying those voices. >> insane people like this guy. >> hello, i'm mike lindell. >> a guy like this is given a platform -- >> because we want to make sure >> when you're watching fox news >> it will make you dumber. >> my original my slippers are

back in stock. >> please -- >> take us off -- >> television before we -- >> allow these crooks -- >> to turn our country into -- >> dumps, big massive dumps! [cheers and applause] >> stephen: well... we've done our part now. while fox news is coughing up cash for spreading lies, the guy they were lying for is busy scamming cash out of the people they were lying to. 'cause yesterday, he made this announcement. >> hello again. this is your favorite president donald trump with some news you are going to really love. a few months ago we almost broke the internet when i announced my trump digital trading cards. well, i've got some fantastic news for you. my trump digital trading cards are back with a bang. >> stephen: his digital trading cards are back with a bang?

that's less natural than the mashup we just did. these cards are nfts, which digital finance experts define as "a scam we all stopped falling for 18 months ago." and the first batch featured the ex-president as wearing race car pajamas, as a bad boy astronaut with robo-belt and making stocks go up with the inspiring hat message. dow. the new batch of cards has some real avant garde work. like him stealing the liberty bell, and this one where he's with a lion that is on fire that is pawing at the earth, which is also floating in the cloudy sky of earth, in front of the beautiful constellation "45 ruuuu!" that one, of course, brought to you by kyle who took some mushrooms and started playin' around with his a.i. artbot. kyle! mushrooms? but that's not all!

here he is reenacting that famous moment when washington looked into the dressing rooms of the miss teen usa pageant. each of these beautiful, collectible embarrassments could be yours for only $99. if they weren't already sold out. honestly, i'm happy for all those maga seniors who were able to purchase these after getting their grandkids on the phone to help them "do a computer." as for my favorite, i can't decide between screaming while playing guitar and screaming while playing guitar on a harley. it's gonna be hard to top that on the next batch. i'm thinkin' playing guitar on a motorcycle, on a boat, hangin' from a helicopter, piloted by a lava gorilla in space! now. $98. you can have it for $98. back down on earth, there's some news from iowa. and it's not good. yesterday, their state senate passed a bill loosening child

labor laws. yeah, kids have had it easy for too long. they're so spoiled these days with their iphones and their ps5s and all ten of their fingers. if you hadn't heard about this bill, it's because it was passed tuesday morning at 4:52 a.m. never a great sign. the only things anyone should be doing at 4:52 a.m. is partying because you're young or peeing because you're not. [applause] now, if sure. swollen prostate! swollen prostate! now, if passed by the house, this bill will allow 14-year-olds to work six-hour night shifts. that's gonna lead to some brand-new homework excuses. "i'm sorry, mrs. larsen. my diorama of treasure island got caught in the hog mangler." 15-year-olds to work on assembly lines, moving items up to 50 pounds. and older teens get the jobs that are even more fun.

because this bill allows 16- and 17-year-olds to serve alcohol. come on. how are you supposed to pour your heart out to a 16-year-old bartender? "oh, had a fight with the missus? i hear ya. i had a big argument with tyler today over who would win, an orc thief or a half-elf magic user. anyway, can i have your cocktail umbrella? i need to redo my diorama of treasure island." got caught in the hog mangler. today's special is mangled hog. in across the pond news, we're just a few weeks away from the coronation of king charles, seen here learning the ingredients of blood pudding. "charles will officially be crowned king on may 6th" is a sentence i am somehow still saying in 2023. and we're starting to get details about the celebration. buckingham palace recently announced the official recipe of the weekend is coronation quiche, along with cooking instructions. i'm told we have a copy of

charles' quiche recipe. step one: tell your valet you want quiche. step two: quiche appears. not all of the preparations are going as smoothly. the palace has reportedly had a very hard time finding any musicians to perform. they've been turned down by harry styles, elton john, the spice girls, adele, and ed sheeran. your highness, hear me out, just hire a d.j. my cousin ricky has an ipod, and a connection to some molly. if there's a bluetooth hookup at westminster, you and camilla are gonna be doing the chicken dance in the aisles. but they have finally found someone to sing for ol' king chucky because we now know that katy perry and lionel richie will perform at king charles's coronation concert. ah, yes, those famous icons of british music, katy perry and lionel richie. you know their songs "'ello" and "i snogged a lass, and it was all right, innit?" we've got a great show for you tonight.

my guests are elizabeth olsen and comedian jena friedman. but when we come back, the latest tech trends. you know me, i love tech. >> announcer: "the late show with stephen colbert," sponsored by progressive insurance. round out your protection with life, phone, and pet health insurance okay, everybody, look at the rv and smile. this is what you want for your family portrait? good point. we bundled the boat with our home and auto first. -hey, team, get on in here. -team? oh. fun. now everyone say "24/7 financial protection with progressive"! 24/7 financial protection with progressive! okay. let's get some singles of me on the bike. honey. yeah.

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ask your doctor about ibrance, a pfizer product. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> stephen: welcome back, everybody. give it up for the band. louis cato and "the late show," band, our friends, beautiful young friends over there. louis, tonight we have two fantastic performers, elizabeth olsen will be out here in a just little while. you might know her from the stuff she does. also comedian jana friedman is going to be out here in a little while. big fan. big fan. also i just want to remind everybody out there watching, if you enjoy "the late show" and you want to see more of "the late show," you should check out "the late show" pod show.

we have a podcast. that thingamajig. extended interviews, jokes that we cut end up on the podcast. we cut them for time, not because their quality. all the jokes are quality. we have extended interviews with nicolas cage, brian cox, lin-manuel miranda and john kander and the nasa artemis 2 astronauts. and many more. who knows. maybe there will be extended interviews with elizabeth olson and jena friedman. i'm up for it. folks, if you know me, i love keeping up with all the latest tech trends, unless that involves updating my software in which case i will be clicking "remind me later" until the sun engulfs the earth. but it turns out today's hottest technology is actually from the past. because, according to multiple reports, gen z is loving vintage technology and their latest vintage obsession is the flip phone. that's right, the flip phone. the number one way for kids to into themselves.

now flip phones don't have a camera. so how do these retro-obsessed young people take pictures? well, don't you worry, because the other hottest gen z gadget is a 20-year-old digital camera. kids, we stopped using these 'cause they sucked! that's like saying "sure, there's anesthesia, but have you ever tried biting on a stick?" but apparently, the flaws are part of the draw. because, while the image quality is poorer, gen z-ers find the vintage look more meaningful and more challenging. yes, from experience, i can say that looking at old photos is definitely "challenging." [cheers and applause] it's going to get better. it's going to get better. it doesn't end there. over the last couple years, gen z-ers have been ditching e-books for real books, and ditching airpods in favor of wired headphones. perfect for anyone who loves listening to music but wishes they could get caught on every item in a two-foot radius.

there's even been increased interest in extremely old methods of communication, like ham radio and morse code. but all this vintage technology is still technology. so what if you're a young person who wants to fully unplug, but still needs to communicate? don't worry, "the late show" has just the product for you. jim? >> sick of social media? mad at modern technology? it is time to go truly retro with 18th century flag based communication. introducing nokia semaphore, the only system designed to cut out the noise and let you talk with your hands like an old-timey sailor. learn the simple code and you'll be chatting in no time. ♪ ♪

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>> no, use the flags. [screaming] >> nokia semaphore. everything old is cool again. >> stephen: we'll be right back with elizabeth olson. one day you might realize going to grandma's doesn't count as vacation. ...but this sure does. when you're with amex, it's never a question of if vacation will actually feel like vacation. it's when. ♪♪

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[cheers and applause] >> stephen: hey, everybody. welcome back to "the late show." my first guest is an actor you know from "martha marcy may marlene," "ingrid goes west," and "wandavision." she now stars in "love and death." >> i've been thinking about you a lot and it's really been bothering me. i'm not sure whether i want you to do anything about it or not.

i'm very attracted to you. i'm just tired of thinking about it so i wanted to tell you that. >> oh. >> stephen: please welcome back to "the late show," elizabeth olsen. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> elizabeth: hi. it's so beautiful here. >> stephen: isn't it pretty? it's really lovely to have you back. i don't know whether i waxed eloquently enough the last time you were here about what a fan i am of your talent and your performances. also the last time you were here, we hadn't seen "wandavision" yet. what an extraordinary show that was. you've done a lot of marvel stuff and there's been a lot of

these marvel shows but that was the one that really broke form in an interesting way and it has such a beautiful and satisfying and heartbroken emotional journey for your character and vision. did you know when you were part of something sort of genre breaking? >> elizabeth: we just felt like paul kept calling us the forgotten cousin to the marvel universe. he just felt like we were some annoying cousin that people threw the corner and i think anthony mackie and sebastian stan were traveling all over the world and blowing things up. paul and i were just like, doing sitcom acting in a corner. obviously our amazing cast and crew. we loved what we were doing, we had so much fun doing it. but we really felt like it was either going to -- it might potentially ruin us all. [laughs]

i think that's the stuff that feels the most fun to me. it's when you feel like you could fail at any second. >> stephen: well, the superpower of that show to me was your ability to approach grief in a way that was beautiful and heroic in some ways. >> elizabeth: the writing was really beautiful and i think it touched on the way we grieve, touched on so many levels beyond it just being an emotional journey. but then it became this huge set piece. it was literally part of the fabric of all of our set. it was written really beautifully and directed beautifully. >> stephen: the last time you were here, you had just done some of your first real avengers stunts and you said when you did the wire stunt, you had to do too many takes because they would hoist you up on the wire.

you couldn't stop laughing. >> elizabeth: your stomach leaves you. it is like the joy people get on roller coasters which i don't get but people of that feeling. >> stephen: have you recovered, you have done three marvel movies since then. >> elizabeth: i have done so many marvel movies. >> stephen: we know of three that you've done. have you gotten better at it? better at the wire work? have you recovered from your giddiness? recovered from giddiness.. how many more of these do you want? i could do this all day. sometimes i get a little freaked out. there was one in "doctor strange the multiverse of maddness" where i had to be dropped from 30 feet up and land and they wanted to drop me pretty quickly so that it looked like it had an impact but i kept landing like peter pan, like fencing. i was like, just use the double. this is so ridiculous. there is a double for a reason. they do it all the time.

and they used it. and in the movie. >> stephen: they used you? >> elizabeth: i am landing and i look like peter pan. i look like i'm fencing. it's ridiculous. we've had so much technolo through these movies and they just chos r for every stunt in that movie. i didn't understand. i didn't do all of them but i did most of them which is a waste of everyone's time because a stunt double does it so much better. do you remember the ending of "witches of eastwick" with jack nicholson covered in feathers. i was just waiting for that moment. i was wet, covered in oil, i was covered in blood. at what point are we going to blow feathers on me? this is getting ridiculous. >> stephen: is it challenging to have those emotional moments when the person that you're talking to is a face covered with little white dots? so that cgi can track them.

>> elizabeth: or purple, or covered in glitter. purple and covered in glitter. >> elizabeth: why glitter? vision doesn't glitter. >> elizabeth: he does. his last airbrushed layer is glitter. >> stephen: just for paul. wants to feel pretty. we have to take a quick break. we'll be right back with more elizabeth olsen, everybody. stick around. at marshalls, our buyers hustle every day to get you great deals on all the good stuff. like this stuff and that stuff and ooh, that's some really good stuff. we get the deals. you get the good stuff. marshalls. (vo) red lobster's finer points of fun dining. thathow to endless shrimptuff. step 1: greet your shrimp. step 2: bid your shrimp farewell. repeeeeeeat. ultimate endless shrimp is back. a cool twenty gets you shrimp aplenty. welcome to fun dining. depend keeps you drier than ever... so you can say yes to more than ever.

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♪ ♪ >> stephen: we are back with the star of "love and death," elizabeth olsen. you come from an acting family and you've been performing since you were four. >> elizabeth: i have been doing camps and showing up at things because it was after school care but i wasn't in a professional -- >> stephen: in other words, go be an extra in your sister's film. we do our research. was there any other option? did you think, i'm going to do this. no, i'll be an actress. was there some other path for you? >> elizabeth: i felt like i knew what i wanted since i was very little. my earliest memories are mimicking musicals and i watched, dancing, singing, also what my group of friends did so when i went through my adolescence, when you try to rebel and stand out and be

different was when i thought i re thould untant. that would make me not basic. >> stephen: being basic was -- >> elizabeth: i'm from l.a. everyone comes here to be an actor. i can't just become an actor. >> stephen: what about actuary tables? that's sexy. >> elizabeth: i should be an investment banker. whatever. i thought i needed to do something different then i got over that when i was 15 and fell back in love with theater. >> stephen: is it ever tempting to go do something else now? >> elizabeth: now it is. i think about it all the time. >> stephen: when you're up on the wire 30 feet from the ground. what do you daydream about doing? getting to do this job, especially when you feel like you're with people who care a lot about it. but i do think it would be fun to do something where there's a beginning and ending that you are in control of. >> stephen: because you are just

doing your part of it and someone else's editing it and special effects. >> elizabeth: and i don't feel like oh, than i should be directing. that's not where my brain goes. i like making mugs or whatever. pottery is great. not like it would be a career. i'm not that good. >> stephen: not yet. >> elizabeth: not yet. >> stephen: who wouldn't buy a mug from this woman. think about it. >> elizabeth: next time i'm here, these will be replaced. >> stephen: that would be fantastic. the new limited series is called "love and death," which is a great combination and it's getting a lot of buzz and i understand it's based on a true story. >> elizabeth: it is. it's based on a true story. i did not know that. the story, let me tell you. it's about a group of young families living in texas in silicon prairie in 1978 and they have done all the things that they felt like they needed to do, they have families, kids,

they have their church community and my character is not happy with just that and she -- like we watched in the clip, she propositions jesse's character to have an affair. a very planned out. >> stephen: very reserved proposition. >> elizabeth: yes. they plan it out for months, this affair, true story. and it's followed by a subsequent murdering of his wife. >> stephen: we have a clip of something behind the scenes. >> elizabeth: oh, gosh. >> stephen: there is no sound. >> elizabeth: no, no sound. it was taped at video village where people watch things while you're shooting them. i have a huge fear of roller coasters. >> stephen: you personally. >> elizabeth: me persoonally.

my character, the scene before is a hard cut from "you like roller coasters" to us being on a roller coaster and we got to the shoot and i knew i was going to be too scared to do it a lot so i asked them to bring in my stunt double from all the marvel movies. she does lots of amazing stunts. asked her to come and ride the roller coaster for me. they need to do it on my face for some of it. i broke down into tears. >> stephen: had you ever ridden a roller coaster before? >> elizabeth: i had and then i didn't. it was too scary. i didn't expect to cry. i'm not a dramatic person don't like drawing attention to myself. i don't like taking away time from shooting but it was a horrible, horrible feeling. this is a video of the one take that i did on the roller coaster. or a snippet of it. [laughs] my character really was supposed to enjoy it. >> stephen: you're having a great time.

>> elizabeth: sweet jesse was really there for me in that moment. and then we start going backwards. they thought this was a good idea for someone who is scared of roller coasters. you do the whole thing and then you start doing the whole thing backwards. that was when i was like okay, i know what's coming. i'm just going to pretend to be the character but the character wouldn't talk the whole time and i'm just talking the whole time. trying to be like, oh, how much fun was that? that was so fun! >> stephen: did you at any point enjoy it? >> elizabeth: no. >> stephen: thank you so much for being here. "love and death" premieres april 27 on hbo max. elizabeth olsen, everybody. we'll be right back with comedian jena friedman. ♪

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♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> stephen: ill-timed. welcome back. ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is a stand-up comedian and writer who's new book is called "not funny." please welcome back to "the late show," jena friedman. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] nice to see you again. always good to see you. >> jena: so nice to see you, stevie.

>> stephen: have you been here in person since covid? i know we talked over covid. i can't remember if i've seen you in the flesh. well, since the last time i know i saw you in the flesh, you have become a mother. congratulations on that. >> jena: thank you. >> stephen: it's a big deal. how is it going? >> jena: it's great. it's so rewarding. no, it's great. it's great. he's wonderful. and healthy. whatever. whatever they want to be, >> stephen: i wasn't asking for that reason. >> jena: i was like, stephen, i love your show. you are so progressive. >> stephen: what's his name? >> jena: well, there is a name. before i get into it, when we found out we were pregnant, sorry, i know that is so cheesy. we found out my husband was pregnant. >> stephen: this is the two of

you together with the baby. the family, the very hungry caterpillar in this costume? that's pretty cute. >> jena: stephen is trying to make it sweet and i'm trying to launch into something dicey. when we found out that when we found out my husband was pregnant, we decided to give it a pet name. it's fetus and not a person. because my husband's last name is epstein, naturally we names the fetus jeffrey. and i had a pregnancy app and every week they would send me a new reminder. jeffrey epstein is the size of a kumquat. it was so cute. we named the fetus jeffrey because i was 39 when i got pregnant, high-risk pregnancy and god forbid anything happen, we wanted to be able to say well, maybe jeffrey epstein killed himself.

[applause] i wasn't going to do the bit but i was like, i have to give stephen something to cut because we are not live and i feel like that's my gift to you. >> stephen: i love it. i absolutely love it. if anyone ever saw that, they would love and too. the new book, and i disagree, is called "not funny." this might be a surprise to the audience but you do not shy away from controversial humor. did your editor fight with you on anything? i have written books and they have said you can't put that in there. was there anything that you wanted to put in that didn't get in? >> jena: i had an idea to have a famous person write the forward and i thought it would be funny

to actually have someone named bill cosby who wasn't bill cosby. >> stephen: so "not funny" with a forward by bill cosby. >> jena: that sells the joke. "not funny" just looks like a feminist diatribe, not like it's not. but not funny with bill cosby. i need to find a bill cosby who is not that bill cosby. there have to be some. i reopened my facebook account which i had closed. then i reopened it. when zuckerberg met with trump. i reopened it and find it a bunch of people named bill cosby. hey, i don't know if you read, but here's a book. i will pay you to write a forward. no one got back to me and then a friend of mine, he said what if those aren't people named bill cosby. what if they are just fans bill cosby now and they know the --

they're on your facebook. so i got scared and then a friend of mine that i grew up with said i found a bill cosby on linkedin and he is down to do it. and then my editor who is also brilliant, maybe don't do that. there's a lot of good stuff in the book. i think a forward by bill cosby might distract from that. and he was probably right. >> stephen: why did you call it "not funny." that is not an apt description of you. >> jena: to some people, it is. no, there are a lot of reasons. one i talk about in the book. another reason around the time when i wrote the book, i had tweeted something that people got very upset about. >> stephen: oh? really? >> jena: shocking. it was around the time of the rnc and i had found out that the mccloskeys, this couple, if you

don't remember, pointed a gun at protesters, were then invited to speak at the rnc. >> stephen: the couple in st. louis on their lawn. >> jena: i thought it was a weird thing to have on your resume, to be a speaker at a national convention. so i had a verified account, i still do but back in the day the blue check people thought it meant something. now it's a different time. but back then, having a blue check mark, if you tweet breaking news, people think it's real. even if you're a comedian that even if you have in your bio, don't quote me. i tweeted "breaking news: brock turner stanford swimmer/sexual predator speaking at the rnc." i also tweeted "that who gave world covid speaking at the rnc." i thought people would get that it was a joke. people got very upset. a stanford professor weighed in

and said... >> stephen: comedians tweet about brock turner and the rnc "not funny," stanford professor said. that's stanford. did you go to stanford? >> jena: i went to your school. >> stephen: that's it. we run all of our jokes by this guy. >> jena: yeah. i think it was a woman, but whatever. [laughter] it was funny to me, the conversation became, comedian tweeted this thing instead of "wow, a critical mass of the country actually believes that a convicted sex offender would be speaking at the rnc" as opposed to just ones that haven't yet been convicted. but... [cheers and applause] >> stephen: jena, so good to have you here.

her new book is "not funny," and it is. it's available now. jena friedman, everybody. we'll be right back.

in las vegas, the most popular food is broccoli.

yeah, that's the only food. they have broccoli smoothies, and broccoli pancakes, and broccoli ice cream, and broccoli hotdogs, and of course, they have raw unseasoned broccoli..... with stems. -daddy, i don't want to go to las vegas with you and mommy tomorrow. oh, are you sure? are you sure you don't want to go, it will be so much fun! >> stephen: good night!

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