>> if that was a lakers game, lebron james would have told th ref, kick her out! e is >> according to eric, rupert murdoch may have separated from his fiancee leslie smith after she said tucker carlson as a messenger from god. ♪ ♪ >> i am here. >> good evening and welcome to "tucker carlson tonight." >> what is your message? speak of the green m&m is no longer wearing sexy boots, now she's wearing sensible sneakers. nicki minaj was not swollen, as far as we know he is fine. it's nicki minaj's friends testicles who are swollen. >> is there anyone else i can speak to?

>> under tierney, the metric system. >> would you mind coming with me for a moment? >> even more because joe biden talks like that. >> i thought this man was a messenger from god, turns out he is just some douchebag! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> announcer: from "the late show" stephen colbert! tonight welcoming nicolas cage, and musical guest christine and the queens! featuring louis cato and "the late show" band. suivanatern tape from. w yos stephen colbert! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> stephen: yeah, baby, yeah! it's

[cheers and applause] watch out. watch out. [cheers and applause] happy thursday. happy thursday. happy thursday. happy, happy. hey, everybody! thanks, hey! [crowd chanting "stephen"] ♪ ♪ >> stephen: thank you, folks. welcome one and all, and here come out there! [cheers and applause] to what the minstrels call "the late show." i am your host stephen colbert! [cheers and applause] for a lot of people out there it is spring break, for instance, president biden is on a

ireland right now being shown around by his counterparts irish president and magical business gnome michael d higgins. higgins invited joe biden to spend the morning at his home and cemented their friendship with a treeplanting ceremony. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> stephen: that seems like a lot of fanfare for something so small. [laughter] oh, look at that, my tie is crooked. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause]

[laughter] okay, i think we got all of the juice out of that one. biden also became the first u.s. president who were ringing the peace bell which commemorates the good friday agreement. look at him go. [bellringing] ♪ ♪ >> this one per piece. >> stephen: for the times the charm! [bellringing. one more to grow on. [bellringing] to lucky number seven. [bellringing] just come get me when it's dinner time, jack. pop joe's getting his clang on. back stateside, you know that

giant leak of classified pentagon information about the war in ukraine and a lot of other stuff that's been all over the internet this week? well, this afternoon they caught the leaker. it's 21-year-old national guardsmen jack teixeira, seen here are not ready what comes next. teixeira was taken into custody in massachusetts, where just moments before he was seen reading a book on his porch. that book "solitary confinement for dummies." for taking these classified documents home to share a teixeira could face charges under the espionage act and could get up to ten years in prison per document, unless he's declassified them with his mind. you can take anything home. the feds may have been tipped off by a story in today's "washington post," reporters tracked down a video game chat

platform used by teixeira and interviewed an anonymous member of the group who said he knew the leaker's real name, the state where he lives, and that he went by the nickname og, which stands for o-gee sus, i should not have told that guy my real name and the state where i live." the informant described as teixeira a characteristic gun enthusiast who while searching for companionship amid the isolation of the pandemic shared highly classified documents. proving that men will talk about literally anything else before sharing a single emotion. no surprise he also made a video in which he stands at a shooting range where he yells a series of racial slurs. also blurred his face and back lead him to hide his identity. but we have obtained an exclusive clip which may contain a few clues. >> he did see the leader of this

group. and ultimately he was. >> brandon, dinner, it's time for dinner, brandon. >> mom, don't say my name, it's supposed to be anonymous. >> brandon, noah, johnson, you get down here right now! [cheers and applause] >> stephen: brandon noah johnson, okay, we check that out. of course the fact that this stuff was sitting around on a video game chat is still embarrassing for our intelligence services and they have announced that they may change how they monitor social media and chat rooms. so gamers, keep your eyes peeled for a post like this "hey other game-teens. where'd you eat those dope classified docs? you can tell me, a fellow youth. i hate parents, no family closed." over and fox news today they began jury selection and demands $1.6 billion definition suit against box. in the trial is going to be intrusive. for instance the judge has ruled

that dominion can compel testimony from the news prsonalities tucker carlson, sean hannity, and janine pirro, and to make sure janine pirro tells the truth, they are swearing her in on a box of w wine. oh, i love a nice box! the excitement is already begun, yesterday the judge sanctioned fox for withholding evidence and appointed a so-called "special master" to investigate whether fox previously made assertions to the court there were untrue or negligent, so the job is to figure out whether fox news l lies? [laughter] hold on, hold on. am i a special master? [laughter] do i get a sash? where's the fanfare? ♪ ♪

[laughter] let's get to the withholding and/or lies. turns out fox's also being sued by one of their former producers and that producer's lawyer released this bombshell. there are secret fox audio recordings of rudy giuliani and other allies of the former president. and this judge is pissed, because fox had these tapes and never turn them over, just ask fox news host and real housewife of nuremberg maria bartiromo. before going on air with him, she grilled rudy whether he had any proof to back up his claims about dominion. >> as much evidence as you can tell us about the lawsuit, whatever you can tell us in terms of that interview would be helpful. okay, great. >> i will tell you exactly what we have. >> just give me at, does nancy pelosi have an interest in it? >> yes, i have read that. i can't prove that.

>> stephen: i have read it, but i can't prove it. but this bottle can prove it. it says on the label... 80 proof! so now fox news employee maria bartiromo knows there is no proof that nancy pelosi was on dominion's payroll. so if she implied otherwise it might put her or fox in legal jeopardy. let's go to the tape. >> i want to ask you about these algorithms and dominion software. i understand nancy pelosi has an interest in this company? [bellringing] >> stephen: maria bartiromo said the phrase that pays. johnny, tell them what to dominion has one. >> $1.6 billion and a dinette set from glory hill, roy hello, suck it, groupie, you reap what you sow you wrinkly demon scrotum. back to you. >> stephen: thank you, johnny.

the judge was also upset that after fox's lawyers claim that rupert murdoch had no official position at fox news, it turns out he actually does. and it doesn't look he is giving up control soon, because reportedly assiduously avoids any discussion of a future in which he isn't in command of the media empire, and reminds people that his mother lived till 103. and he cannot make it till 103. because just like a fine wine, the older he gets, the more the weird sentiment begins to collect. [cheers and applause] it's not just his work life that is going down the rupe-tube. rupert murdoch called off his engagement to a former dental hygienist and leslie smith just two weeks after announcing it. i know, that's so sad. but on the bright side... ladies, he's back on the market! hello. put on your flirting shoes, and get good at telling whether

something is a liver spot or a lesion. [laughter] yes, is that -- is that? is that a skin tag it, or you just happy to see me? >> wow. >> it's a fun image. she may not be missing out on much, because apparently rupert is not the greatest husband, case in point, a year ago he woke broke up with his wife saying "ending all marriage, we have had some good times, but i have much to do. my new york lawyer will be contacting yours immediately" adding, "use discount code splits pilfered 10% off of divorce attorney." there is news from baseball, america's pastime. the mlb introduced a pitch clock and it is working, because average game time is down

31 minutes on track to be the lowest since 1984. yeah, man. yes. of course in 1984 players sped up the game with an innovation known as piles of coke in the dugout. but the pitch clock has hurt one of baseball's most important traditions, and that's drinking. because shorter innings means that teams have less time to sell beer games. what? if i can't have three $12 beers, how am i going to be drunk enough to buy t two $15 hot dog? we have a great show for you tonight. my guest is nicolas cage! yes, that one. and when we come back, i talk science! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause]

>> announcer: "the late show" with stephen colbert, sponsored by the makers of zurtec, model no more.

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♪ ♪ >> stephen: give it up for "the late show" band with mr. lewis kato up front they're my goodness! right here and hold that magic ticket. this is the magic ticket right here, because this is the thing. these are the questions i will ask him just a little while of the one and only nicolas cage that is going to be right here! [cheers and applause] folks, i love science. it has given us so many experimental discoveries. penicillin, electricity, froot with two os. they synthesized it in the large hadron collider. and i like to bring you all of the latest science news and my long-running segment, the sound of science. ♪ hello science mild friend ♪ [cheers and applause] people love it! people love it!

first up, new research suggests that the earth's core seems to be surrounded by an enigmatic layer between the earth's solid mantle and its scorching hot liquid outer core. a reason seismologists referred to as the first bite of french onion soup. [laughter] the new research suggests that previously we have thought of the area around the earth's core as simple nested layers, but the zone is more of the geological aspect being described as "hot rocky jell-o." or is it is known in the midwest, "salad." [laughter] next up -- sure, why not. next up, according to new research, stressed plants make ultrasonic clicking noises which researchers recorded by putting microphones next to living plants. worst podcast ever. [laughter] the researchers found that plants and meant a sound when they become dehydrated or infected or when they are cut.

so the next time you mow the lawn if you hear a million tiny screams, that's just the grass begging for mercy as you dismember it. and if you hear one big scream, that's just you coping with the reality that you know this now. [laughter] next up, according to new data, after a little because of covid in recent months, sexually transmitted infections have spiked significantly across the big apple. well, it's just like sinatra's famous song -- ♪ start spreading the gonorrhea ♪ in order to stop the spread, the city's increasing testing by repurchasing lab equipment used for covid tests. that's fine as long as they don't also repurpose the testing sites. [laughter] wow. wow. wow. [applause]

found the line. next up, according to new research "drunk my sober up twice as fast when given a hormone injection." oh, thank god. stuart little can't afford another dui. next up, scientists have discovered a leak in the bottom of the ocean of low salinity mineral rich spring water that acts as sort of a tectonic luke lubricant. tectonic lubricant is also so much better than ky jelly fish. according to the researchers the fluid is coming straight from something called the cascadia mega thrust. tectonic lube, mega thrust, doesn't matter if we pollute the ocean? it's already so dirty. next up there is some big paleontology news, because tyrannosaurus rex had lips, a new study suggests. finally he explains all of those t-rex skeletons found buried with the trumpet. [laughter]

that's for you, baby. that's for you. next up, scientists tried magic tricks on monkeys and discovered that the sleight-of-hand to move being demonstrated here was more likely to fool them if the monkey had opposable thumbs. this is sure to be a big hit at the upcoming international scientific symposium of stuff we did instead of curing cancer. oh, at 2:00 p.m., how to impress worms with juggling. [laughter] next up, a lump of brown fur are found deep in the yukon territory has been identified as a 30,000 year old squirrel. wow, that's quite a turn for scrat. but i am excited for the new "ice age 8, i thought there would be more dignity in death." until next time this has been... ♪ the sound of science ♪

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>> stephen: hey, everybody, welcome back to "the late show" already in progress. ladies and gentlemen, my guest tonight is an academy award-winning actor who has been in some of your favorite movies. now starring in the new film "renfield," please welcome to "the late show" nicolas cage! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> nicolas: thank you! [cheers and applause] >> stephen: yes! >> nicolas: well, first of all it's remarkable to me that this is the first time we are meeting. >> stephen: i've looked forward for a very long time.

very excited you are coming on. >> nicolas: and it's been over ten years since i have been in. sullivan theater with david letterman coming i've done some amazing things! spilling a couple of coats of paint. >> nicolas: it's absolutely beautiful. >> stephen: it is very exciting to have you, nicolas cage, i am a nicolas cage fan, and there you are, nicolas cage right there. >> nicolas: it's just me. it's been on but if you want that nicolas cage feeling, you can do better than nicolas cage. you have been in so many movies, everyone has their favorites, obviously i am a "national treasure" man. "raising arizona" "leaving las vegas" "valley girl." >> nicolas: i was 17 years old. it's been on my high school girlfriend had a crush on you and i'm still a little mad about that. what are nick cage top five nick

cage films? >> nicolas: i will start with "pig." i love "mandy." i love "bringing out the dead" martin scorsese directed. so i loved "bad lieutenant" i loved a movie called "joe" that dave and greaney directed. >> stephen: all right, there you go. i go face-off. >> nicolas: i like that one a lot. i love "face-off." >> stephen: it looked like it was a lot of fun to make while you were making it. >> nicolas: what was interesting about "face-off" and it could have mentioned "vampire's kiss" which is what i made when i was able to explore my abstract dreams with film performance. i was playing a character losing his mind but beginning to think that he was the vampire from the original "notes nosforatu"

movie. so i got to act like a french film star, which was cool. but "face-off" was a big movie i made at paramount and i was able to use what i learned from this little "vampires kiss" movie and it worked. and people dig it. so i was happy with those results. >> stephen: you made headlines, sometimes, i think it might've been during covid, you said you preferred the word "thespian" to the word "actor." and i'm curious why you being is appealing to you? [laughter] that's why i say colbert. >> nicolas: that is a great thing that you brought that up. what i was saying was of course you can call me an actor. and by the way, i never said don't call me an actor, call me a thespian. that's what clickbait did, and somehow it got picked up by cnn.

i'm not sure how it got picked up by cnn, sure that they have more important things to report on. but i see acting as storytelling. and what it is is trying to get to the truth of a character. in the first actor in europe was someone called thespis. and he broke free from the course and started narrating and telling a story truthfully. so i think acting is finding the truth of a story. what is interesting is actor in greek means hypocrite. i don't want to be thought of as a hypocrite. i'm sorry if that sounds pretentious. [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> stephen: let's talk about your next movie, which is extremely enjoyable, the new movie is called "renfield," starring you, nicholas hoult, awkwafina, and ben schwartz. it's funny, it's horrifying. you are dracula. what is the premise?

>> nicolas: well the premise is a unique one and it's a very good when i think, very relevant and current, and nicholas hoult plays renfield, and it's his movie. >> stephen: for those of you who don't remember, renfield -- >> nicolas: he was played by dwight fry beautifully from the universal studios "dracula." >> stephen: he is like a man servant to dracula. >> nicolas: in this movie renfield is the star and he is trying to escape from a toxic relationship, a codependent relationship. he is trying to free himself from that. and dracula want to let him. >> stephen: who is a narcissist. >> nicolas: a sociopathic king of bait and switch tactic, i'm sure they had a lot of fun together maybe 200 years ago on the road as rogues. >> stephen: but the spark is gone. >> nicolas: now the relationship has turned sour.

and renfield once out to. and he realizes the error of his ways. and i don't want to let him out. because to me dracula from my view, the reason why dracula is so compelling as a character is still about the human experience. this addiction to blood. well, you can supply that with alcohol, heroin, sex, and that's a human issue. or this curse he has. eternal life, what does that mean? it means he is going to get his heart broken over and over again forever. so he is very pained by that. so in this clip you will see later when renfield once to leave, it's a betrayal to dracula and is very hurt by it. >> nicolas: because renfield goes into group therapy. >> nicolas: he goes into a codependent group therapy. >> stephen: he does. >> nicolas: but that was the tricky balance, because it is actually not a funny subject

matter, it's a serious subject matter. so we had to find a way to play it and give genuine regard for the serious situation and tap dance around it to find where we could mind the humor. >> stephen: the humor and the multiple decapitations. it's a horror movie too, let's not forget. >> nicolas: one of my favorite tones and filmmaking is this blend, you would not think that horror and comedy go so beautifully together. but "american werewolf in london" her delicious. i was watching it and i was like i'm laughing and i'm really scared. it slaps you around. i'm like this is great filmmaking. and that's the bull's-eye we were trying to hit with "renfield." >> stephen: here is one of the bull's-eyes right here. jim. ♪ ♪ >> would you like to introduce yourself to the group? >> i am the prince of malaysia.

some call me the dark one. others the lord of death. however, to most i am known simply as -- >> renfield's boss. ♪ ♪ >> i am dracula. >> okay, obviously we are dealing with a little bit more than narcissism here. [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> stephen: we have to take a quick break, but don't go anywhere. we will be right back with more nicolas cage, everybody! stick around! is a cranberry.

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>> stephen: hey, everybody, we are back here with the star of the new film "renfield," it's nicolas cage, everybody, how do you approach portraying dracula? you have done a lot of parts over 100 movies, but this is so iconic and i'm sure so many people play the part before, how did you avoid those roles or how did you draw inspiration?

nicolas: well, what i did as a starting point was to look at my favorite interpretation and my personal favorite was christopher lee in the hammer horror films, i thought he looked great with the '60s hairdo, he brought the ferociousness to the character, i love what old men did, and so there was a lot to look at. but i also wanted to find influences that were more close to me. and i think the biggest influence because my father august, he liked to speak with this mid-atlantic accent. i was channeling him and "vampires kiss." you know, nicolas let me explain something to you. it is to be how your father would talk? >> nicolas: he said i want to speak with the distinction because he is a literature professor.

but i never could understand -- >> stephen: he was an actor himself? >> nicolas: i guess he was speaking with distinction because he was teaching about great literature, so what was he supposed to do? so he was a big influence, and then the other influence was an bankroll from "to the graduates. her performance as mrs. robinson, i thought was a very toxic relationship with dustin hoffman, and the way that she spoke. it doesn't he look like the kind of guy who has to fight them off. yes, he does. that's dracula. >> stephen: you are trying to seduce me. >> nicolas: that's right. i had not thought of it. do you want me to seduce you? [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> stephen: he has some great clothes. did you ever keep the stuff that you wear? do you ever keep the stuff from

set? >> nicolas: i came into "wild at heart" with this snakeskin jacket i found at a secondhand store. >> stephen: you source to that? >> nicolas: i sourced it. i said i don't know where, but i will wear it in a movie at some point. and i said to david lynch i want to have kind of a marlon brando in "the fugitive" look, so i went to where the snakeskin jacket, so is that i loved it, next her. that solid gold, buddy. and he would write this is a symbol of my individuality and belief in personal freedom, so i want to brin elvis presley into this. i think that sealer would look up to it as a channel, so it's what i call a warhol performance, and i was taking these icons and meshing them together and doing what i wanted in the way that they spoke and dressed. >> stephen: did you ever meet

brando? >> nicolas: i did meet marlon. and i said to him, he was giving a talk, he showed his movie "burn" at caa, and i went to the screening with giovanni, and i said, marlon, i just want to know that everything you have done has inspired me. and he said "oh, jesus, nick, give me a [bleep] break." and an entirely different response i had was jerry lewis who i also grew up watching and he was my favorite comedian. and i would watch him and wait for them by the tv in the '60s wishing, willing that he would come on tv and the 90 professor would come on. and more often then not it did because it was the '60s. and i said, nick, it's jerry, i just want you to know there's ae

that just loves what you're saying. why don't you come out to las vegas. i have a great show was sammy davis jr. i want you to be my guest." so i flew out with my brother and we sat down and saw the show, it was a great show. and he the typewriter gag and it was wonderful. and i went to his suite to say hello, annie came out in a japanese kimono and baseball socs with a shrimp platter on the piano. and i was like "jerry, i just want you to know, it's just you and brando." and he took about a 32nd pause and he said, well, "brando is good also." [laughter] >> stephen: so jealous! to what is interesting about that as you see two uniquely different responses, one is very

brando and one is very jerry. >> stephen: we have to take another break, but don't go a away. nicolas cage when we come back. stick around. ♪ ♪ car...y to everyday proof your no matter how tough the job is. armor all technology. less work. more clean. mr. clean magic eraser powers through tough messes. so it makes it look like i spent hours cleaning, and you know i didn't. it makes my running shoe look like new! it's amazing. it's so good. it makes it look like i have magical powers. magic eraser and sheets make cleaning look easy. (vo) red lobster presents fun dining: taste buds need not be faithful to one shrimp dish. powers. thrill them with shrimp three ways. try the new cajun shrimp trio, richly seasoned with cajun flavor. it's a bold new way for shrimp three ways. welcome to fun dining. dove men invited dermatologists to test new advanced care body washes that start solving skin issues in the shower. it's a very great way to control your breakouts.

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>> nicolas: if i was in route to go on broadway and do a musical, the only part that would make sense for me, because i have over the years blown out my voice singing "purple rain" incorrectly and karaoke bars, so no i have a punk rock gravel. but i think that might lend itself to pontius pilate in "jesus christ superstar." >> stephen: it's my favorite musical ever. i would do anything to have a part. maybe peter or something. >> nicolas: do you have time? eight shows a week, you are here. >> stephen: i would quit the show. let pontius pilate, all of the power of rome. so the king is once again my guest. >> nicolas: i won't break out into song tonight. >> stephen: ♪ and was herod unimpressed ♪ ♪ we turn to rom♪

>> nicolas: ♪ the grace of destruction ♪ ♪ if you want to ♪ ♪ you and this puppet ♪ >> stephen: it has to happen. [cheers and applause] well, look. look, nick cage. let's not make it another 58 years before we talk again. thank you so much for being here. [cheers and applause] "renfield" opens in theaters tomorrow. it's nicolas cage, everybody! we will be right back! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪

pain hits fast. so get relief fast. only tylenol rapid release gels have laser-drilled holes. they release medicine fast... for fast pain relief. and now... ...get relief without a pill. with tylenol dissolve packs. relief without the water. >> stephen: performing "to be honest" from his upcoming album paranoia, angels, and true love, christine and the queens! ♪ ♪ ♪ i get lost in my thoughts ♪ ♪ and for hours of time ♪ ♪ and it's making me feel ♪ ♪ like i am not alone anymore ♪ ♪ to be honest ♪ ♪ i am trying to love ♪

♪ but i'm afraid to kill ♪ ♪ and i never know when ♪ ♪ when to search or stay still ♪ ♪ so i fly ♪ ♪ to be honest with you ♪ ♪ broken and yet tender ♪ ♪ always in, always out ♪ ♪ heading to the water ♪ ♪ drowning in what it can hide, hide ♪ ♪ kind of always cautious ♪ ♪ don't you, don't you break my heart ♪ ♪ feeling kind of loveless ♪ ♪ yet always ready to try ♪ ♪ and i've been through so much ♪ ♪ that sometimes it feels far ♪ ♪ it is like a movie ♪ ♪ played by another star ♪ ♪ she's a stranger ♪

♪ to be honest ♪ ♪ now i'm sitting alone ♪ ♪ and i'm trying to listen ♪ ♪ to the stories that could ♪ ♪ make mine a little softer and fine ♪ ♪ to be honest ♪ ♪ broken and yet tender ♪ ♪ always in and always out ♪ ♪ heading to the water ♪ ♪ drowning in what it can hide ♪ ♪ kind of always cautious ♪ ♪ don't you, don't you break my heart ♪ ♪ feeling kind of loveless ♪ ♪ yet always ready to try ♪

♪ away, away, away ♪ ♪ away, away, away ♪

[cheers and applause] >> stephen: christine and the queens, that's it for "the late show"! good night! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ lots of things we are going to save the day ♪ ♪ we are here to do our