tonight on "20/20" -- with parents like these. mothers who have kid then decide they don't want to be around them. >> i don't have to get them to brush their teeth, i don't have to be up until 11:30 to do their homework. i don't miss that. >> but what do their children miss? >> do you love your children? >> more than anything. >> more than yourself? >> should a mother love her children more than herself? >> moms moving out. a teenager busting out. with breast enhancements but the plastic surgeon who does the job, her very own father. for an 18th birthday present. >> like the best day of my life. i'm not even kidding. >> judge me the way you want. i think i made the right decision. >> doctor daddy.

mortified by mom in a two-piece? you ain't seen nothing yet. >> my life revolves around her boobs. >> the ones her mother keeps implanting. >> if she gets them bigger it would be like chaos. >> mother of the year? and dads, we didn't forget you. leaving your child alone in a stroller in the splash zone at sea world? >> if you're that stupid, i want you caught on tape. >> tonight, "with parents like these." >> don't our parents always embarrass us? >> not like that. here's barbara walters. >> good evening. do you know women who tell you that in order to be better mothers they need to spend less, not more, time with their children? so they leave their kids in order to make a better life for themselves? it's motherhood at a distance, sometimes thousands of miles. elizabeth vargas has that story. >> reporter: mother of the year

she's isn't. 12 years ago, brenda heist dropped off her 8 and 12-year-old children at school, and then vanished. in news reports, her grieving family said they assumed she'd been kidnapped or murdered. >> it was tough. i mean every prom, my brother graduated from thihigh school a college, i graduated, and she wasn't there. >> reporter: but last year heist finally reappeared, looking stunning admission.made a she had abandoned her family on purpose. it's the rare extreme of a mom gone awol. the reaction? widespread revulsion. don't judge, says mom talyaa liere. she's no brenda heist, not even close, but she's faced similar scorn for deciding to live apart from her children. >> i had a lot of shame because of the, the way that we think about what mothers should be. >> reporter: that they would never leave their children? >> some people think that. >> reporter: talyaa is a so-called non-custodial mother,

a mom without physical custody of her kids. in 2008 she moved to seattle after a divorce, leaving her three children, nathaniel, eric and serena, to live with their dad david 2,800 miles away in pennsylvania. talyaa spends her days painting, writing, making music and practicing martial arts with her boyfriend. mothering -- >> hey, give me a wide shot of your room. i just want to see what it looks like. >> reporter: well, that's done from afar. >> i'll walk you through the steps of scrambled eggs. >> reporter: oh sure, she e-mails recipes for them to cook for themselves and she stays in touch on the phone and via skype. >> you sound a little like you have a cold. >> yeah, i have a cold. >> reporter: but they only see each other in person around once a year. >> okay, so miss sweetcake, i'll talk to you again soon. >> we talk all the time. we're very connected. >> reporter: and that's as good as being there? >> i can't answer that it's good as -- it's just different. >> reporter: i know a lot of people listening to this will want to know, do you love your

children? >> absolutely, more than anything. >> reporter: more than yourself? >> should a mother love her children more than herself? >> reporter: startling as this may sound, there are an estimated 2.4 million non-custodial mothers in the united states. many of these mothers are heartbroken by the loss of custody. but some moms, like talyaa, give up custody voluntarily. author rahna reiko is also a non custodial mother. her teenage sons were 3 and 5 when she and her husband divorced. since then, she sees them for four to five hours, three days a week, an arrangement she initiated. >> they come over after school, they stay until bedtime, and then he comes to pick them up, and they go home to bed. >> reporter: rahna is brutally honest about why she made her decision. >> i never wanted to be a mother initially. i realized that i had, that i had kind of fallen into this role that i had never intended to fall into. >> reporter: rahna wanted to devote herself full time to her

writing, not to her children. she's the rare mom to admit she does not pine for the daily grind of parenting. >> i don't have to get them to brush their teeth. i don't have to be up until 11:30 to do their homework. i don't miss that. >> reporter: talyaa has a different reason for leaving. she says post-divorce conflict between her and david was causing enormous stress for her and the kids, and that leaving, while a wrenching decision, was the only way to ease the tension. why so far away? why did you have to get, move 3,000 miles away? >> well, at, at that point, was it ten miles or 3,000 miles or 3 million miles, it really wouldn't make any difference. >> reporter: well, because at ten miles you could still see the kids and have -- be a presence in their lives. >> right, but in order for the conflict to go away, there had to be a certain distance. >> reporter: david says there was no conflict, and he says talyaa's sudden transformation from stay-at-home mom to west coast bohemian was astonishing. >> i'm completely surprised, even to this day. >> reporter: and his friends? >> they were shocked.

it's like, how could a mom leave her children like this? what got into her? >> hi, mama. >> but she has a spiritual connection with them, that is rather profound. and accordingly, she doesn't seem to need to have that physical contact with them. >> how's my boy? >> reporter: complicating matters further, taylaa's youngest child eric has down syndrome -- their longest time apart was more than two years. kisses with mom? a computer will have to do. you have a special needs child. did it make you think that you owed it to him to be there for him? >> eric is the kind of child that connects to whomever he's around. and it sounds strange to say this from his mother, but people are kind of interchangeable to him. i could tell from how he is that he will have a wonderful life, whoever he's around. >> reporter: talyaa has been called "selfish",

"irresponsible" and "delusional." rahna has been called worse. >> i got death threats. i got people telling me that i am evil, that i'm worse than hitler, that i'm, that i'm human garbage. >> reporter: some mothers would say your decision to leave was putting care for yourself ahead of care for your children. >> i think that better women make better mothers, when you love and know yourself, then you can be a better mother for your children. >> reporter: but how are you being a better mother 3,000 miles away? >> because i'm in touch with who i am. >> reporter: i know, but how is that benefiting them? >> it allows me to make choices for my children from my heart rather than from what i think society tells me about what a mother should be. >> i've never seen him play his drums. >> reporter: you chose to be a mother. aren't you now just abdicating that responsibility and saying, "well, i don't want to sacrifice anything?" shouldn't mothers sacrifice for their children? >> i think no mother should have to completely sacrifice.

i think to sacrifice your own wants and needs and desires for someone else's life -- what kind of a message is that sending your children? >> reporter: here's a surprise. not only is her ex-husband david satisfied with the arrangement. >> i think it's been great for the family, from my standpoint. >> reporter: her son nathaniel supports his mom, despite the distance. >> yeah, it's difficult, but, no, i'm not going to grow up hating her and never speaking to her again. i think my mom's a good mom. even from far away. >> reporter: but for 11-year-old serena, who was only 8 when her mom left, the emotional toll is palpable. >> when i was growing up, and my mom lived with us -- then i have, like, a lot of happy memories. >> reporter: serena saves every memento from her mother. >> these are some christmas wrappings i saved.

these are my birthday cards. they are kind of special because we don't see her a lot. >> reporter: she has also become a surrogate mother for eric. >> i make eric's lunch and i feed him breakfast. sometimes i am actually kind of angry with her that i don't have a mother to do what a mother does. >> reporter: in her blog the better mother's project, talyaa defends her decision, with her message that there is not only one right way to be a mother. rahna agrees. she says she has managed to have it all, an award-winning book and a close relationship with her sons. >> i think if i was a man, none of this would be an issue. people have this idea of what a good mother is that somehow their, i don't fit that mold. but i definitely fit the mold of a terrific divorced dad. >> reporter: talyaa has lived apart from her children for 6 years now. we checked in with serena when she was 13 years old, she said adjusting to life without mom had become easier. >> our relationship is really a lot closer than it was before.

we can talk about relationship problems and what is going on in a girl's body. and i just, you know, i really love my mom a lot. >> reporter: but serena's vision of her future life as a mother? >> as a mom i never wanna be apart from my children. i want to make that perfect family that she was never able to do. i want that really badly now. >> mama loves you, bye. >> oh, dear. what do you think about these mothers who choose to do their parenting from 3,000 miles away? let us know on twitter using #abc2020. and we'll be right back. >> announcer: next -- dozens of drunken teens at a party, some passed out in the yard. >> they say they were beer cans and vomit everywhere. >> announcer: when the police came who got in trouble? the parents inside.

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>> announcer: "20/20 saturday" continues. once again, elizabeth vargas. >> reporter: prom and graduation season have arrived and along with the dresses, corsages, caps and gowns come the parties. raucous teen bashes that can strike fear into the heart of any parent. paula and barry spencer know the feeling well. for them, last june 16th started out as a day of celebration.

>> there was a lot of jumping up and down. >> a lot of jumping. >> yeah, yeah, it was, it was amazing. >> reporter: their 18-year-old son, nicky, along with his high school baseball team, had just won the state championship. it was a big day for the small town of falmouth, maine. >> nicky asked me if he could have a celebration at our home. >> i didn't know necessarily what the party would entail, but i mean, it's assumed that people are gonna be crazy and pumped up and hyper after a big win. >> reporter: the spencer's enjoyed entertaining their son's large group of friends, but say they would never cross the line like the dad in this "what would you do?" scenario, who actually buys alcohol for his teenage son. >> you never threw a party for your kids? >> never. i have four of them. never. my oldest is 30. never. it's the wrong message to send them. >> reporter: the spencers say they were definitely looking to avoid sending that message. what were the ground rules? >> he actually told us, we'll keep it to 50, and i said, "nothing illegal." >> reporter: those would prove to be famous last words.

>> barry came to me and said, "i'm starting to see people sneaking in alcohol." >> people from other towns started hearing about it, and we started having people show up who i didn't recognize, and kind of got a little out of control. >> reporter: around 10:30 p.m. an anonymous tip comes into the falmouth police that there are more than soft drinks being served at the spencer's home. sergeant george savidge was on duty. >> when i pulled up to the house, a gentleman came out and identified himself as mr. spencer. and he said that he was hosting an alcohol- and chemical-free party. >> reporter: sergeant savidge leaves, but partygoers keep arriving. >> i saw lots of people coming with just boxes and boxes of beer in the woods. >> reporter: so when the police first came to your house, you already knew things were getting a little dicey. >> mm-hmm. >> reporter: it was a little more than you could handle. >> yes. >> reporter: why aren't you walking through the house saying "time to go home?" >> i felt like i invited these kids to our home to celebrate, and i didn't have clear evidence that they were all drinking.

i also really felt at the time that if i walked around and said "all right, everybody, we're shutting it down" they'd run to their cars or do something that's more dangerous. >> reporter: so you thought it was safer to let them stay and continue to party at your house? >> but not drink. >> reporter: at 11:30 another falmouth police officer makes a traffic stop near the house. in the car he finds a drunken underage passenger who says she's just come from the party. police make a bee line back to the spencers. how had the scene changed? >> at this point it looked like there was a party going on. >> reporter: not just a party -- a rager that has ballooned to around 100 rowdy kids openly drinking in the backyard when police descend to break it up. >> it was just mayhem. they started breathalizing any kids that were trying to leave. >> the first thing that i remember was a policeman saying that my dad was going to jail.

>> reporter: going to jail, even though the spencers didn't provide a drop of the alcohol? it's happening to parents all over the country, like this mom who was sentenced to six months in a massachusetts jail for hosting underage drinkers -- even after claiming she was duped by duplicitous teens. and this tennessee school teacher was arrested and then fired for the post-prom drinking party she says she unwittingly threw. denials aside, district attorney stephanie anderson believed the spencers were the latest example of parents turning a blind eye to tipsy teenagers. >> there was no real attempt to prevent underage drinking at that home. >> reporter: she points to the police report from that night which describes a scene fit for a frat house, complete with a teenager passed out on a neighbor's lawn. they describe the scene at your house that night as, "an animal house." an animal house. >> mm-hmm. >> reporter: they say there were beer cans and vomit everywhere. >> that's just not true. >> reporter: but anderson didn't

buy their story and she went after the spencers, charging them with allowing minors to consume alcohol in their home -- a crime that now had them facing jail time. >> they wanted to be the cool parents. >> reporter: the story quickly got the attention of the local media. >> i mean, can you imagine at that moment how you're going to feel? i'm going to get in trouble, i'm going to get arrested. >> wrong! wrong, wrong. 21 and over you can drink, 21 and under you can't drink. it's the law. >> reporter: a few clicks on youtube illustrates the ever more devious and dangerous ways kids are finding to get drunk, from eyeball shots, to vodka gummy bears to downing hand sanitizer. it may make you wonder whether adult supervised drinking parties are such a bad idea. what's more dangerous? having my kids down in the basement where i know they're going to drink a few beers or having them go out to the softball field at night and drink where there's nobody to keep an eye on anything? >> in this scenario, there's no difference at all. there wasn't anyone there to keep an eye on anything.

>> reporter: but anderson had a hard time convincing a jury of that. when it did go to trial, it was split down the middle. >> yes. >> reporter: six to six. >> yeah. >> reporter: did that surprise you? >> no, not terribly. it's a very divisive issue. >> reporter: rather than retry the spencers, anderson offered them a deal. no jail time, but they would have to pay $17,000 in fines and restitution, write a letter of apology in the local paper and serve 100 hours of community service each. >> reporter: you know that there are critics who say that you were overzealous in this. that you have a cause you're promoting. >> well, underage drinking is one of my causes, that's true. >> reporter: but do you really think you're going to stop underage drinking? >> no, i don't think i'm going to stop underage drinking. >> reporter: so then what have you done? haven't you chased it back to the unsupervised, unchaperoned location? >> well, i think what this case did was, i think it got the issue out in the open. i think parents are, putting themselves in the position of the spencers and saying, what

should i do differently? if i'm going to have a party i'm going to have chaperones. >> we did not intend for kids to drink. it happened, and i'm sorry that it happened. >> reporter: are you ever going to host another party? >> our 12-year-old is already asking to have an end-of-year pool party. and they're sixth graders. i'm sure that we can manage that. >> reporter: you sure? >> i would maybe ask a parent or two to stick around. >> announcer: next, talk about house calls. >> my dad a week before is like you're getting your boobs down this day. i'm like what, oh my gosh. >> daddy wasn't just telling her, he was doing the surgery himself. >> i'm so happy i did it. later, even more dads with some questionable moves. the highlights and the lowlights. very low. kickball with your child in the net. and catching the winning ball while your child goes -- wait,

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plastic surgery, as young as 10? dre breast implants for her 18th birthday performed by her very own father. i sat down with this family to see what it was they had in mind and body. ♪ >> reporter: orange county, southern california the land of beaches, bikinis and beauty treatments. lots and lots of beauty treatments. >> getting your breasts done is basically like getting -- it's like abnormal to not have a breast augmentation here. >> want to get some botox so i can stay young forever. >> shawn and britani, these 25-year-old adopted sisters hold regular botox parties for their

friends. >> you ready? >> all right, you ready? miss charm, miss brittani, first. >> reporter: and who's the doctor -- their dad. the two sisters are no strangers to dad's treatments. at 10 years old, charm was unhappy with her belly button. dad came to the rescue. >> dad knows best. >> reporter: charm, you had plastic surgery when you were ten years old. >> belly button. >> reporter: on your belly button? was it out and he made it in? >> yeah, it was an outtie, and i didn't like it at all. so i went under anesthesia, and he changed it for me. >> reporter: as they grew up d dads fix ups went beyond the belly button. you wanted your breasts made bigg bigger? >> yes, from a very young age i had really wanted to get it done. >> reporter: why? >> just to build my self-esteem. and i didn't have large breasts when i was younger, and all my friends did. i felt very self conscious about it. >> reporter: did you not feel that maybe 18 was too young to

have a breast enhancement? >> my daughter was asking me to have augmentation at 16. my wife, on the other hand, felt we should wait until she was 20. >> reporter: in fact, her mother penny was dead set against the idea. >> i fought it. her father -- everybody agreed but me. i fought it for a long time, saying no we're not doing this, this is not right. >> reporter: as brittany's 18th birthday approached, she begged her parents for the one present she really wanted -- a new pair of breasts. >> i didn't think that i was going to actually get it done. and then my dad you know a week before was like, "oh, you're getting your boobs done this day." i'm like, "what?" i was like, "oh my gosh!" i was so excited. like, it was like the best day of my life, i'm not even kidding you. it was like the best thing ever. >> reporter: isn't it a little, daunting to operate on your 18- year-old daughter? >> not really, i mean, i've operated on my family members, from my sons to my daughter to my wife to my father. and being in practice for 30 years, i felt who would give them the time and the patience that their father would give

them. >> reporter: some may question a father doing surgery on his own daughter. >> some plastic surgery walks they feel you shouldn't do that because you might make a poor judgment call but i don't feel that way. they're my daughters. so, didn't feel uncomfortable at all. >> i'm so happy i did it. and they're like the perfect size, not too big, not too crazy. >> reporter: brittany, charm and their friends, now in their 20s. are all looking forward to a lifetime of lasers, peels, nips and tucks. >> look how beautiful rachel is. she's not 23. >> all they say to preserve their youthful looks. >> how do i look, dad? >> sexy! >> reporter: lip injections, botox, skin smoothing and tightening -- >> next! >> reporter: you're so young. why do you need botox and fillers and everything else? >> well, if you look at a picture of me when i was 17, i look the same. so hopefully in 20 years from

now, i kinda look the same too. >> it's preventative. it's just preventing the lines from forming. it's not so much that i feel i have wrinkles already. >> we'll put a little more on this side than this side. >> reporter: have either of you had other procedures done? >> yes, i have had my nose done when i was 21. >> reporter: by daddy? >> of course. and then i get botox. >> reporter: what about you? >> i get botox as well and lasers and peels for my face. >> fine little needle, this is 20 units of botox. >> be nice to me, dad. >> i will. >> i also get it in my armpits so i stop sweating, which is -- which is nice. >> reporter: and lucky for them, all their procedures are free. >> here is to staying young forever. >> the fountain of youth thanks to botox. >> reporter: but is it all too much? you know, there are people who are going to look at these two beautiful girls and, and you doctor and say there's just too much emphasis now on looks. >> i somewhat disagree, because

i'm not changing their looks in any means. they want maintenance. they don't want to get old. they want to stay young. >> reporter: do you think there's too much emphasis on looks? >> definitely. i think the society we live in, for sure, orange county, you know, l.a. -- it's definitely a huge influence. >> reporter: charm, you did not want to have your breasts made bigger. >> no. i didn't have boobs until after i quit gymnastics, and then they appeared overnight. >> reporter: and that was enough for you? >> yeah. >> reporter: but this year charm changed her mind and asked dad for bigger breasts. again, mom was against it at first. >> i didn't react to her wanting a boob job very well at all. so i fought it for a long time. and then i saw them, and i was thinking if i was her age i would want them. >> they're perfect. thanks dad. >> i just saw charm's boobs for the first time. look at those boobs. >> reporter: but when is it a parent's job to say that's enough? >> i was thinking about getting

my breasts redone, a little bit bigger. but i am going to wait on that, so because i'm not 100% confident, and he does not think i need to do it. >> i think she's perfect. so i -- she'll have to visit another plastic surgeon, i guess. but -- >> reporter: charm and brittany are thrilled with their bodies by dad. but for some people, having cosmetic surgery done by a parent is a little too close to home. "bad parenting," "bad message about self-image and self-esteem," but this dad and doctor stands firm. >> judge me the way you want. i think we made the right decision again building up their esteem, telling them how beautiful they were since day one. that's always been in our vocabulary. when they come to a father with a concern, my ears were open. >> it really bothered me just because people don't understand. they're saying mean things being ignorant, simple-minded, and

mean. >> yeah, ignorant is a very good word. >> i have the best dad in the world. >> thanks. i appreciate that. next -- d is for dad or maybe just dumb. because he's now starring in the videos that are going viral. >> here is another dumb dad. look at that. >> next on "with parents like look at that. >> next on "with parents like these." firse it seemed used by it at very counter-intuitive if you're eating healthy. i had no clue how that would affect just the breaking down of the enamel on my teeth. the only thing at that point that i could do is to prevent it from getting worse. the dentist recommended that i use pronamel to help strengthen my enamel. i can't live without coffee, i can't live without fruit, and i think that pronamel gives me a peace of mind that i'm taking care of my teeth for the long-run.

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>> announcer: "20/20" "with parents like these," continues. here's dan harris. >> reporter: usually we think of dad as the one holding the video camera, recording everybody else. now, though, the lens is turning, with fathers taking starring roles. and dad isn't just going viral, some dads are even becoming their own online brands, like bat dad -- it's picture day and i notice you have toothpaste on your shirt.

we're going to be late for the bus. it's range. get daddy some donuts. you'll figure it out. >> reporter: and king daddy. >> what did you say about the new girl at school today? >> she didn't notice me. >> welcome to the struggle. >> reporter: but as long as there's baseball, there will be a dad dropping his kid to catch a fly ball, like this example from this year's spring training. >> hey, pick him up. oh, my goodness. >> reporter: here's another dumb dad. >> look at that. >> reporter: there are some valuable lessons embedded in these clips. to figure out what they are, we enlisted dad and comedian hal sparks, and parenting expert dr. jeff gardere, to take a look at our fatherhood lowlight reel. >> ooh! >> reporter: exhibit "a," this dad giving new meaning to the term penalty kick. >> parents think some of this stuff is cute. and that child, subconsciously or in the future, may not trust his father as much.

>> kid takes it stride though, falls down and gets right back up. >> reporter: check out this dad at a theme park, leaving his son unattended in the splash zone. >> okay, he's not big enough to get in the water ride we'll just park him near where the water will hit him and he'll get kind of the experience. don't do that to your kid. >> reporter: from the theme park to the ball park, often the venue for classic dad discombobulation. look at this guy. >> baby in one hand -- >> reporter: this dad doesn't even manage to hold onto the kid. >> his daughter just tumbles out of his lap into the bleachers. >> reporter: yeah, the look on her face pretty much tells the story. >> yeah, "you idiot." she gave him the death stare. and he deserved it. >> reporter: is there something about the hardwiring of the male

brain that makes us just slightly less capable? >> i think you're being very kind by saying "slightly less capable." i think we're a lot dumber in some of these things. yes, of course, it's the way that we're hardwired. we're much more rough and tumble. we're not as nurturing. >> reporter: there really is something about a sporting event that can summon a father's evil side. look at hockey coach and dad martin trembley druing the post-game handshake ceremony. >> he looks back, and he scoops his leg. you do realize you're a grown man, right? >> reporter: the 13-year old he tripped broke his wrist. trembley was banned from the league, and sent to the grownup penalty box -- jail -- for 15 days. >> i think this peaks the bad dad meter into bad human. well into bad human at this point, overall. >> reporter: it gets even darker than that. this surveillance video from a gas station in detroit at 3:00 in the morning became a national

story. look closely at who's driving, a 9-year-old girl, her father in the passenger seat. >> she drove me here. 9 years old. >> yeah, she's 9! she drove us here! awesome, i have such a system. is that camera on? >> reporter: the video went viral and the dad, sean weimer, went to court, where he was sentenced to two years probation. >> if you're that stupid, i want you caught on tape. >> reporter: speaking of punishment, remember this dad? tommy jordan made a huge splash, even getting interviewed on "20/20," after he decided to take his daughter to task for an anti-parent rant she posted on facebook. >> when your parents tell you do something, you do it. you don't go, ugh, fine. >> reporter: in retaliation, he went eastwood on her laptop. >> the only lesson this taught

this guy's daughter was "dad is a maniac, and i can't wait to move out." >> reporter: dr. gardere says this is the exact wrong way to punish your kid. >> good parenting would be all of that time and effort that he spent at making that video, spending that time instead sitting with his daughter, talking with her about her behavior. >> reporter: now we should say not all of the caught-on-tape moments involving dads are negative. let's wrap up with this thing up with clip from a father letting it all go. he's become known as the dancing dad on the internet. >> i think his dancing technique was spectacular, it served the purpose, and i stand by him 100%. >> reporter: in conclusion, in an era when more moms are working outside the home, more dads are stepping up. but as they do so, our experts say, the humiliation doled out by these viral clips should

serve as a useful reminder. so your bottom-line message to dads seems to be -- "don't be an idiot." >> don't be an idiot, think about what you're doing. you're allowed to make mistakes. but for heaven sakes, learn from your mistakes and try to be a better dad. next -- does mother know best? not according to her humiliated kids. when she's planning on trading up her implants. >> if she gets them bigger it will be like chaos. >> what if she dies? does she really care that her kids could be left alone. >> next on "with parents like these."

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"20/20's" "with parents like these." here's deborah roberts. >> reporter: taking a walk with mom is a challenge for lacey wildd's 17-year- old daughter, tori. >> uh-oh, she's bouncing. >> when people see my mom with large implants, i feel like they judge me. usually, girls just, like, laugh at her, like, make fun of her. men just calling out. my life revolves around her boobs. >> reporter: every moment, tori keeps a wary distance. >> bye, guys. >> reporter: after all, it's not easy living with a mom whose 52-inch assets are on clear display. >> it's annoying. i feel like we should have a normal time, you know, walking down the street. i wish she could take them off when we go places together. >> gun shoes. >> reporter: lacey wildd is all about living large. >> bye, everybody. >> reporter: very, very large. much to the dismay of her son brandon. >> everything's fake, i think. i don't think she looks pretty

at all. i think she looked pretty before she even had the surgery. >> reporter: lacey claims to have the seventh-largest breasts in the world, a way to support her family through public appearance fees. but those volleyball-sized implants are the source of bitter conflict between mom and daughter. >> people will start booking her kind of like, you know, when you go see, like, that two-headed man, you know? it's not like they're booking her because, "oh, wow, she's, like, sexy." >> thank you, dear. i just love you saying that. >> i'm just saying. like, you know -- they, like, people -- >> she's basically saying i'm the sideshow. i want you guys go play on the ipad. and as soon as i'm done here, we'll go to the park for a while, okay? >> okay. >> all right. >> reporter: lacey's work on her website cuts into mom time, according to younger kids jenaveve and brandon. >> she's always busy on the computer, her phone. she never -- >> ipad. >> she never does anything with us. she's like -- >> i just got asked to do, go to the grand opening of a day care because they want the dads to get involved.

>> reporter: so how much do you think you'll make because of those breasts? >> i'm looking maybe to make $250,000 a year. my boobs are my paychecks, for sure. >> reporter: your boobs are your paycheck? >> 100%. >> reporter: it wasn't always this way. lacey started life as a tomboyish girl next door named paula. >> i was just a flat-chested, brown-haired little girl from a midwest town. that's the house i grew up in. i slept on the floor. i don't think i'll ever be that poor again. >> reporter: married at 16, divorced with two kids by 21, she was scraping by as a waitress when suddenly she had a big idea. >> i changed my hair color, and i got my breasts done, and my money just started rolling in. >> reporter: 12 breast surgeries later, good-bye paula, hello, lacey wildd. but being lacey comes at a cost. she can't even pick up her 5-year-old daughter.

>> i can't lift her up and pull her to me because, let's be honest, i'm out pretty far. i can't work out. i can't jog. >> we used to ride bikes together, like, every night, and we can't do that anymore. >> reporter: sleep, too, is a difficult balancing act. >> she has to have, like, a pillow on her boobs. >> yeah, she has to have, like, three pillows under her boobs. >> after a little while, i can't take it anymore. i feel like i'm being suffocated. >> she sleeps like this, like a mummy. she's like -- >> reporter: lacey's kids endure a much greater hardship every day, the scalding shame of public embarrassment. >> my mom walked in to drop me off at school, and this kid says, "your mama has big boobs." that made me feel so crazy. >> so weird and awkward. >> yes. >> i do want my kids to be happy and not be embarrassed of me and not be, you know, having to worry about being bullied at

school, or feel embarrassed at all. >> reporter: so at home in sunny south florida, lacey sometimes goes to great lengths to come off like the mom next door. >> extra large pants, extra large jacket is required for this operation. so look, normal mom, right, in 100-degree weather. >> reporter: nice try, but not good enough for 11-year-old brandon. >> i want her to get them smaller, not stay the same or get bigger. and then i would be happy. >> reporter: well, get ready, kids, for a new round of zany. >> remind you of anybody? >> reporter: lacey is about to double the size of her breasts, going from a triple l to a triple q. >> if she gets them bigger, it'd be like chaos. >> they'll be, like, 42 pounds. >> reporter: is it safe? >> absolutely not. these aren't safe. i'm a walking time bomb is what the doctor told me. >> reporter: the surgery is so risky no american doctor will do it.

tori is outraged that her mom is willing to take that chance. >> what if she died? is she really taking that into consideration? does she, like, really care that her kids could be left alone? >> reporter: but lacey's fans urge her on, donating for the upcoming procedure in brazil. >> you know, when people like put on the internet, like, "oh, i'm gonna kill myself. i'm gonna do this." people -- like, "do it, do it," 'cause they don't really care about you. they just wanna see you do something crazy. and then they're -- so are you gonna do it? >> well, i haven't done it yet, so -- >> and that wasn't what i asked. >> reporter: your daughter, tori, is really upset with you. >> she thinks that i'm being irresponsible, by putting my life on the line. >> reporter: you say it's upsetting, i feel bad, i don't want them to be upset, but why do it? >> it's the money. it's the money. i need the money. >> reporter: money to send tori to college and care for her two younger children. come on, no. there are people who are working two jobs at a grocery store and a department store. >> i was doing okay. but i -- i've quadrupled my income. >> reporter: do you ever regret

this? >> hmm -- no. actually, i don't. i don't regret it. i would do it again, absolutely. >> reporter: even knowing that your kids are upset and embarrassed? >> don't our parents always embarrass us? >> the other day, i went to a party, and this kid came up, he's like "are you tori?" he's like, "the one that has the mom with the big boobs?" i'm like, "yep, that's me." >> reporter: do you think that this could permanently damage your relationships with your children? >> i don't think so. my kids love me for me. i am very loving. my heart's bigger than my boobs. >> well, love may be forever but lacy's measurements aren't. she just told us she's decided to do a complete overhaul, a facelift, nose fix and bottom built up as well as getting even larger implants. so, what do you think? let us know on twitter using the #abc2020. we'll be right back.

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that's our program for tonight. but an all-new "nightline prime" is next. it's about a mystere ois texas church with mostly young people

whose family say they have lost almost all contact with their kids. what's going on in that texas church? find out. i'm barbara walters, stay tuned because that story starts right now. it's saturday night in america. lights on. this is "nightline prime." tonight, we're deep in the heart of texas. tracking down members of a mysterious church that is attracting between i did-somethings, some of whom have cut off almost all done tact with their family, as desperate parents drive the streets of one tiny town searching for them. >> will you please tell me about catherine? >> doesn't anybody have anything to say? >> come on, jack. >> we're looking for answers about the church of wells. then the ultimate makeover everyone's been talking about. the woman who went under the knife to look like her family celebrity, jennifer lawrence. controversial? you bet. and so, tonight, she's back and talkg